Bat Toes and ‘Tocks

by Meg on March 30, 2009

According to this bat-tographer; "When you reach into a bag of bats to pull one out, they’re usually upside down and what you first see wriggling out is a cute little bat butt. " Yes, yes I see that.

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Bat toes and ‘tocks by The unquenchable.fire! Ow! Ssssss [hot to the touche]

{ 107 comments }

1 Theo 03.30.09 at 6:01 pm

Have we ever had a *bat* before???
[searching]

2 Theo 03.30.09 at 6:02 pm
3 Andi 03.30.09 at 6:03 pm

I don’t think I’ve reached into a bag of … bats … before. But I should start.

4 Theo 03.30.09 at 6:04 pm

PS: battocks!

5 Camero 03.30.09 at 6:05 pm

I just got back from Cuba a couple of weeks ago and saw some of the friendliest bats ever! The were flying in a little group around a tree that my friends and I were standing under. They came within a few inches of us! They were too cute!

6 Aoife 03.30.09 at 6:07 pm

Reminds me of when I had serious bat envy after watching a show about a group of Australian housewives who volunteered as “foster moms” for an endangered indigenous bat species. The women were cuddling upside down baby bats while being interviewed, and the bats looked as happy as could be.

7 Trisha 03.30.09 at 6:10 pm

A bag of bats? Batbag? I am intrigued…

8 Bathos Q. Hauteur 03.30.09 at 6:16 pm
9 gloom raider 03.30.09 at 6:18 pm

Aw…bat-butt!

10 chanpon 03.30.09 at 6:24 pm

Prehensile bat toes! I love bats, and this makes them all the more adorable. I have to say the furry battocks (with modestly hidden bat bits) are very cute. Yes, I typed bat bits.

11 ding 03.30.09 at 6:27 pm

Those feets look like garden rakes. Also, I want to see the rest of the bat!

12 ding 03.30.09 at 6:28 pm

On those sultry southern summer nites, when my friends and I would play tennis late into the evening, the bats would sometimes echolocate and attack our airborne tennis balls. True story.

13 googlie eyes 03.30.09 at 6:29 pm

I love that there’s a rule of thumb (or in this case, finger) for extracting bats from a bag. Who knew?

14 Theo 03.30.09 at 6:30 pm

Bathos — nuc nuc nuc.
:)

15 Dorothy 03.30.09 at 6:35 pm

Looooove the hover text!!

16 Tori 03.30.09 at 6:37 pm

That must be a very wee bat.

Also: A “bag of bats” is a surreal concept to me.

17 Manny 03.30.09 at 6:43 pm

My grandma has cankles, and my grandpa *does* call her an old bat.. coincidence? hmmmmm

18 violet 03.30.09 at 6:44 pm

Where is the rest of the bat?

[Cave! - Ed.]

19 bev 03.30.09 at 6:52 pm

And it’s “when.” Not “if.” Not “I’ve been known to.” Not “There are people out there who sometimes…”

It’s “WHEN you reach into a bag of bats.” Like – sure, we all do that. Oh look, they have bags of bats on sale at Target…

20 ThreeCatNight 03.30.09 at 6:54 pm

“Hey Randy, where’s the rest of me?!”

21 Anne Boleyn 03.30.09 at 7:03 pm

I can hardly remember the last time I reached into a bag of bats.

22 Kristabelle 03.30.09 at 7:10 pm

Teeny, tiny bat toes!!!

23 Frankie 03.30.09 at 7:21 pm

Theo beat me to the punch
with “battocks.” It’s nice to know that, for a brief
second, I had a Theo-type
thought.

24 kasia 03.30.09 at 7:26 pm

“When you reach into a bag of bats…”

A common scenario indeed. ;)

25 Theo 03.30.09 at 7:27 pm

To be fair, Frankie, I’m kinda plugged in here. ;)

26 Paunchie 03.30.09 at 7:28 pm

hey Rocky! Watch me pull a bat outta my bag! Nuttin up mah sleeve – PRESTO!

27 Theo 03.30.09 at 7:29 pm

Kasia —
I find it far more difficult to speak
Than type, with tongue ensconced in cheek.

28 Sniper 03.30.09 at 7:35 pm

Those tiny little bat feet are hanging on to the last joint of a finger! Oh, my god.

29 scooterpants 03.30.09 at 7:35 pm

zat does not look like dee back of dee bat, looks like the front. i see no bat butt in dees peektur.

30 Katrina 03.30.09 at 7:36 pm

Oh, sure if you go to one of those Toney Stores like Target, you get a Bag of Bats.

Now, me, living with the common folk, we get our bag o’bats.

Wonderful tennis story. Or, is is a bat story, hmmm…

31 Von Zeppelin 03.30.09 at 7:42 pm

It never fails. . . the bat I want is always in the bottom of the bag. I’m going to start keeping mine in something like the boxes with the cardboard dividers they give away at the liquor store.

32 Ray 03.30.09 at 7:44 pm

that must be an itty-bitty-baty if his bum only spans a finger tip.

33 Theo 03.30.09 at 7:46 pm

Bat Pockets, Von Zeppelin. You’ll make a killing. (remember us little peeps)

34 Kiragirl 03.30.09 at 7:53 pm

“When you reach into a bag of bats…”

right, like why would you do that? the feetsies are ‘kinda’ cute, though.

35 Von Zeppelin 03.30.09 at 7:55 pm

Excellent idea, Theo. Maybe something like a carpenter’s apron with bat-sized pockets. You could paint their toenails in color codes so the right bat is immediately at hand. (Checks for website of U.S. Patent office. . . )

[http://www.google.com/patents?hl=en - Ed.]

36 zeldapie 03.30.09 at 7:59 pm

Bats are soooo cute. I saw some at the Wildlife Rehab Center, but couldn’t touch them ‘cos I don’t have the rabie vaccination. Darn! Leetle bebeh bats are teeny and anerable. I wanna feed ‘em mealworms!

37 zeldapie 03.30.09 at 8:00 pm

rabie = rabies

38 Gail (the first one) 03.30.09 at 8:34 pm

@VonZep: Somehow, that reminds of the SNL sketch “Anal-retentive Chef”, a Phil Hartman classic.

39 Argyle Donkeypants 03.30.09 at 8:41 pm

Holy burlap bags of bat-butts, Batman.

40 Lucy's mommeh 03.30.09 at 8:50 pm

I liked watching the bats coming out of the flashing around the neighbors’ chimney. Then they went & sealed it up. They suck. There was a little bat out by the front door at work once. I was dumb & petted it a tiny bit. Very soft. like a moushie. I started making a chitter at me and I backed up.
And once one got in our house. It was found on the floor-we *think* our rather out of shape Mollie caught it or bit it. Poor thing (bat) looked like a dead little leaf. All in all, bats are cool…:)

41 Theresa 03.30.09 at 8:53 pm

Theo, we had Bats with Binkies™!!
http://www.cuteoverload.com/2008/07/the-dark-knight.html

Pretty wild, huh? >0

42 Theresa 03.30.09 at 8:54 pm

PS Bats love Schubert!! Ask me how I know (looking around for Katrina) ;)

43 Theo 03.30.09 at 9:00 pm

Hehe Theresa. You pasted the new URL format, I pasted the old URL format.

44 Theresa 03.30.09 at 9:07 pm

But Paunchie, that trick never works!

45 Way Cool Groovy Chick 03.30.09 at 9:24 pm
46 piratejenny 03.30.09 at 9:42 pm

For a Bag o’ Bats, I’m thinking Costco; at Target you’d probably just get a 6-pack or something. (hm–am due for Costco trip–what aisle would that be?)

47 Lisa R 03.30.09 at 9:51 pm

Yah, there’s no bat ‘tocks there. Bat knees, bat toes, and bat GROIN, but no buttocks. S/He’d have to be turned around for that. Dun’t mean the package isn’t precious!

48 berthaservant 03.30.09 at 9:58 pm
49 AuntieMame 03.30.09 at 10:19 pm

“Suppose I carried my family about with me in my pocket, how many pockets should I want?”

“Sixteen,” said Piglet.

“Seventeen, isn’t it?” said Rabbit. “And one more for a handkerchief–that’s eighteen. Eighteen pockets in one suit! I haven’t time.”

There was a long and thoughtful silence? . . and then Pooh, who had been frowning very hard for some minutes, said: “I make it fifteen.”

“What?” said Rabbit.

“Fifteen.”

“Fifteen what?”

“Your family.”

“What about them?”

Pooh rubbed his nose and said that he thought Rabbit had been talking about his family.

“Did I?” said Rabbit carelessly.

“Yes, you said–”

“Never mind, Pooh,” said Piglet impatiently. “The question is, What are we to do about Kanga?”

“Oh, I see,” said Pooh.

50 Michelle S. 03.30.09 at 10:24 pm

, ,
/\_^..^_/\
/ |\ { ° } /| \
(V’v ”V” v’V)

51 Michelle S. 03.30.09 at 10:27 pm

Aww boo. My lil bat didn’t draw right. :[

52 Theresa 03.30.09 at 10:31 pm

B-serv, at least it wasn’t a box of rocks.

53 Michelle S. 03.30.09 at 10:36 pm

Actually, Lisa: I am pretty sure those are bat tocks. That’s the back side of the bat.

54 Izzy 03.30.09 at 10:48 pm

I was think it was the “front butt” also. The way the feets are pointed…

55 dia 03.30.09 at 10:49 pm

A bag of bats? Such is the stuff of nightmares!

56 Joools 03.30.09 at 11:03 pm

Isn’t anyone else channeling Irving Mainway (Dan Akroyd from the OLD SNL) – Bag o’ glass… Bag o’ Tacks… Bag o’ Bats!

57 Jen2 03.30.09 at 11:26 pm

Hmm, a bag of bats…. now where do you buy THOSE?

58 emmemm 03.30.09 at 11:31 pm

Yay for bats on CO!

59 bev 03.30.09 at 11:46 pm

Well, in all honesty, I get my bags of bats at Aldi’s. I find their quality really no different from the name brands and in this day and age, saving money on your bags of bats is important.

60 Theresa 03.30.09 at 11:48 pm

YO YO THREADJACK:
Who’s a classicist here?? Even if you’re not, but read the Aeneid in HS or college, YOU MUST SEE THIS!!!
http://terpconnect.umd.edu/~ecarlson/aeneidonfacebook.jpg

61 Nik 03.30.09 at 11:56 pm

I love the tiny knees! And Theo, LOL at “battocks”. Nice one.

62 Katrina 03.31.09 at 12:39 am

Theresa, dear, do I want to know how you found that? Terrific study aid! Von Zeppelin ought to have fun with that! “The bat I want is always at the bottom of the bag!” indeed. And you Peeps who are indulging him with pocketed aprons (manly-man aprons to be sure) aren’t helping, you are just egging him on!*snerk*

Now, I heard you calling me from the darkness-what can I do for you? Oh, yes, Meine schattze, Die Fledermaus!

Great, now I’ll have ‘what’s her/his name’ sighing in my head all night- or is that Rosenkavelier-the Marcheline? I always get those two syrupy things mixed up.

Thanks for thinking of me, sweetie! I bet Anner could have answered that, too, but I got there first! BWAHHAHAHAH! My Theresa, Mine!

63 Katrina 03.31.09 at 12:41 am

I don’t know, by the way the feet are hanging,(gripping) it looks like a “Full Bat Monty” to me.
I suspect that bats have tidy bits.

64 Theresa 03.31.09 at 1:45 am

Katrina:
Re your assessment of “Der Rosenkavalier”: HUMPH!!!

Rosenkavalier =/= Fledermaus.

The only thing they have in common is that they are both Viennese. And have waltzes in them. And were written by someone named Strauss. Oh damn!

Actually, neither of them is exactly syrupy unless performed badly.

Anyway, you never asked me how I know that the wee batties love Schubert, mmmmmmmmm?

65 Theresa 03.31.09 at 1:54 am

GLAD you asked. I was in a summer student orchestra in Vermont one summer, not telling how long ago. We were playing a concert one night: Schubert’s Unfinished. OK we get through the intro, then the first theme. I’m playing the first clarinet part, playing with the first oboe. Flap flap brush brush. On my head. Flap Flap squeak squeak brush brush. ( eeeek eeeeek eeeeeek!)

I was a pro, though, and soldiered on. In those days you could have exploded a bomb around me while I was playing. Anyway, we just kind of got used to the bats flapping around us as we played.

66 kibblenibble 03.31.09 at 3:05 am

Teeny tiny furry guy! Bag of bats, indeed! :o )

67 googlie eyes 03.31.09 at 3:16 am

Theresa,
I am only coming up with a teeny tiny version of that link you posted. How do you get to the real FB group (I’m not a classicist, but I am a Medievalist, so this would be useful for me)?

68 Theresa 03.31.09 at 3:38 am

Googlie, the teeny tiny thingie you saw should blow up to full size when you lick on it.

69 Theresa 03.31.09 at 3:38 am

Yikes! Typing disease! I meant CLICK on it, of course.

70 Theo 03.31.09 at 3:50 am

I like the first way better.

71 verbatim 03.31.09 at 4:04 am

It’s a furbatum.

(furry bat tum-tum)

72 AuntieMame 03.31.09 at 4:24 am

Theresa, I saw that on TheOneRing.net earlier today. Hilarious!

73 googlie eyes 03.31.09 at 5:02 am

Aha! Thanks :o )

74 Hon Glad 03.31.09 at 5:59 am

“Listen to them, children of the night, what music they make”.

75 Theresa 03.31.09 at 6:09 am

Flap flap squeak squeak!

76 Theresa 03.31.09 at 6:10 am

Now Theo, that just wouldn’t be good for the computer screen.

77 Katrina 03.31.09 at 1:04 pm

…or one’s tongue, for that matter!

Great story- you were unflappable!
*snerk*

78 Von Zeppelin 03.31.09 at 1:37 pm

As to the Vergil Facebook, I object strenuously in the name of aging Classical Language nerds everywhere! It is just WRONG to make Latin poetry fun and interesting. Everybody should have to study the Aeneid like I did–in a poorly lit, overheated classroom with a snotty British professor who opens the book at random and makes you translate at sight. Change is bad and dangerous and frightening.

Or, to put it another way,
Quidquid id est, timeo Danaos et Facebook ferentes.

79 TooMuch 03.31.09 at 1:50 pm

“Holy bat toes Batman-I think the Joker has got us again!!”
Soooooooooooooooooooooooooo Tiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnyyyyyy!!!!

80 Katrina 03.31.09 at 2:04 pm

If bats could speak, they would speak Latin. I’m sure.
They would also have their toenails painted very bright and happy colors. Yes, I’m sure.

81 Theresa 03.31.09 at 2:20 pm

VonZep, Aaaack! I fear VonZep, even bearing an Internets!
Way to rock the hexameters!

82 Theresa 03.31.09 at 2:32 pm

PS what did snotty Roman adolescents say to their parents?
“Quidquid!” (snort, eyeroll)

83 Katrina 03.31.09 at 3:05 pm

Whatever, Theresa? Just too-too!

A hemidemisemiquaver to you for your creativity! A nice, sharp and pointy one, too! Great for your sandbox!

84 bucky 03.31.09 at 3:13 pm

All you bat lovers: check out Bat Conservation International.
WE LOVE BATTIES

85 superboymom 03.31.09 at 3:43 pm

I know he is sweet and tiny, and I could LOOK at him all day . . . but reach into the bag o’bats? That’s one “grab bag” I don’t think I could handle! :-)

86 Noelle 03.31.09 at 3:48 pm

When I was a kid we had a pool and on warm nights we’d go for an evening swim. We would have to duck to avoid the bats coming down for a drink. I had no problem with bats until a few years ago when two of them got into the house and began flying around the family room at 1am when I was all alone. I was able to open the door and get one of them to fly out fairly easily but the other had flown into my parents’ room. Luckily I used to watch a lot of animal secials with my Dad and remembered that bats liked darkness. So I turned the lights on in my parents room and off in the hallway and the little guy flew out, back into the family room, and out the door after his buddy. Man that was scary! I still don’t know how they got in the house in the first place!?

87 Meaghan 03.31.09 at 3:49 pm

When I was spelunking about five years ago I saw a lot of bats. They were no bother. They flew around me and the other people in my group a few times, no doubt curious as to what these large pale creatures were doing in their cave, and then returned to their nests. I got to see one up close, upside down, asleep. It was cuter than I would have expected. It looked like a mouse with wings.

88 A Noun 03.31.09 at 4:07 pm

Rabies. Rabies. Rabies.

That’s all the phrase “bag of bats” means to me. Rabies. 100% fatal rabies.

89 Biscuits for Idjits 03.31.09 at 4:37 pm

Who said rabies? *winds up with a biscuit*

90 Theo 03.31.09 at 4:51 pm

Mmmm, biscuits! I’ll get the honey…

91 gryt 03.31.09 at 4:53 pm

With this pickie? This blog is officially on its way to amassing one heck of a collection of ‘tocks… Now THAT would make a good coffee table book: “The CO Official Encyclopedia of ‘Tocks”. For reals Meg!

92 Yitzysmommie 03.31.09 at 5:16 pm

bag of bats…..When one reaches into a BAG OF BATS…
thanks for the brain worm you guys! I’ll be picturing bags of bats all day long now; hesitating before I reach into anything resembling a bag….

93 Theresa 03.31.09 at 6:08 pm

Gyrt, we should check first to see that Janes’s IG doesn’t have the franchise on that. ;)
http://catalog.janes.com/catalog/public/index.cfm

“Jane’s Book of Tocks”

94 Theresa 03.31.09 at 6:10 pm

PS is it true that the word “spelunk” come from the sound of an amateur caver falling into a deep, hidden pit in the dark?

95 Estella 03.31.09 at 6:46 pm

Leetle batties! Just a cautionary note though, remember that if you ever see a bat on the ground who looks injured, call animal control — do not touch the bat with your bare hands!

I do wildlife rehab, and a family once brought in a little bat that they had kept for a day or two, trying to “raise” it…doh >.< and brought it to us after the bat refused to eat anything. It turned out that the family had all handled the bat with their bare hands, including their little kid, and their cat had possibly mouthed the bat. We are required to call the CDC and report a potential rabies situation, since rabies is transmitted in saliva and bats lick themselves. We had to euthanize the bat instantly, because a rabies confirmation is done by dissecting the brain. The family pet is under quarantine. If rabies is detected, the family has to get shots. All because they picked up the bat instead of calling animal control, who would've brought the bat to us for rehabbing :(. Then at the rehab center, we could've added him to our bags o' bats!

96 Theresa 03.31.09 at 8:07 pm

Poor li’l batty! You almost made me cry! I’ve liked bats since I saw the mommy bats hanging upside down nursing the tiny bebeh bats in the Bronx Zoo World of Darkness. They looked like little furry upside down Madonnas. Not the one from Michigan.

97 Katrina 03.31.09 at 8:24 pm

Ypsilanti Madonna? Not that one?

98 Leslie 03.31.09 at 8:44 pm

They are too tocks!! All bat toes point the ‘wrong’ way, and the knees too!

If bat toes were oriented like ours they would have to hang with their backs to the wall. Try taking off like that! You’d whap your wings on the wall and be facing backside-down in flight. Not a pretty picture at all!

You can only get rabies from a bite, so please keep your fingers out of those bags o’ bats and carry them carefully to your local bat rehabilitator!

Bat World NOVA

99 rafi 04.01.09 at 1:31 am

you lost me at “Bag of Bats”

Or
as we say in the midwestern united states “Sack of Bats”

100 Nik 04.01.09 at 1:49 am

Did anyone see the episode of Dirty Jobs, in which Mike was knee deep (I kid you not) in bat guano? That really was a dirty job. eew.

101 Theresa 04.01.09 at 2:26 pm

Katrina, I totally forgot the famous phenomenon of the Madonna of Ypsilanti, who appeared in a small fat stain on a Sonics floor. But not that one, either.

102 rodona 04.02.09 at 6:05 pm

I think that’s the front of the bat, too. Here’s a picture of a bat and his feet point the “right” way.

http://www.northrup.org/photos/bat/fox-bat%20(21).htm

103 jennifer 04.03.09 at 3:54 pm

OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG PONIES!!1!!!! I made it on CO. And while I was out of town for a week. Yay for bats on CO! Thanks for posting.
jennifer

104 jennifer 04.03.09 at 3:56 pm

what I mean by that is, I took this picture. but you already figured that out. my 2 nanoseconds of relative fame on my beloved cute overload and I wasn’t even here to enjoy it. sigh.

105 bathead 04.03.09 at 6:38 pm

ass-end of Ardops nichollsi, correct?

106 margo 04.07.09 at 9:27 pm

Bats?? Oh god no. Please. Not bats. I simply cannot find teh cute in them.

107 mya 04.08.09 at 12:38 pm

I’m noticing a trend that the froot bats get all the glam face shots, and the microchiropter-eensies get only butt shots. Are the wee batties relegated to a life of lite porn!? Oh the bat-manity!

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