The Lurking Nose!

In icy Nosevember, as the west wind blows
As mercury plummets and shutters close
As candles flicker their final throes
What lurks nearby, do you suppose?

Ruh-rohs!

From highs or lows, in grim repose
Its steady, strident sniffing grows
Like tell-tale hearts in tales of Poe’s
And where it comes from, no one knows.

Yesss, I yam eeen-VEEEES-ee-bulhs.

So heed this warning, to all those
Who seek out warmth for frozen toes
Where icy moistness sometimes goes,
Beware the chill of … THE LURKING NOSE!

Dscn1505

Warm thanks to Kirsten S.(top photo) Eilen R. (middle photo) and Emily (bottom photo.)

88 comments … read them below or add one

  1. fish eye no miko says:

    Awwww… cute widdle nosies!

  2. Kallisto says:

    And what is more: great little poem. NoMToM, I like it!!!

  3. LOLBabyMama says:

    Holy moley…nose number 3 looks just like my dog Betty!

    Check out her laziness!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dAgWOCXxv3k

  4. Welcome, foolish nostrils, to the Haunted Mansion …

  5. Michelle S says:

    Best. Poem. Ever.

    That’s it. I’m starting a NTMTOM fanclub.

  6. eikoleigh says:

    cute

  7. emudoug says:

    that poem, and the accompanying shnozels, is truly, truly, truly outrageous.

  8. Jackie says:

    I’m kind of in love with your poetic abilities.

  9. bugmom says:

    Brilliant!

    I love it! All of it!

    I hope my “Beep” hand is strong enough.

    *flexes fingers*

    Oh yeah. I’m going in!

  10. Babs says:

    A work of genius.

  11. PJ says:

    Um, I think nose-pupster #3 is leaking some tailio, but I’m sure it’s just a temporary set-back, they’ll get their nose-tique perfected still yet.

  12. mberkie0 says:

    C’mon, peeps! This is Nose-vember, after all.
    Great poem, NTMTOM! As we have said before, we are not worthy! *Kneels at feet of the master and bows*

  13. Bell says:

    Becky, your dog. . .looks like just the one I had and had to give up. PLEASE show me another picture! Is she nearly 7? Please, I would love to know. Thanks!

  14. holligans says:

    I’m with bugmom…let the Beeping begin!

  15. T.U.M. says:

    NOMTOM, I can actually hear Vincent Price’s voice in my head when I read that poem.

    (Don’t ask me about the other times I hear Vincent Price’s voice in my head. MmmmmhahahHAHAHAHA!)

  16. ThreeCatNight says:

    Oh, for the love of God, Montresor – let us split a cask of Amontillado to warm these frosty nosicles!

  17. Decca says:

    I wanna be all snuggled under a blankie with a warm critter….but it’s 75 out and decidedly NOT Novemburrr weather.

    Love the poem, the noses, and the hope that someday fall weather will actually hit the bay area.

  18. divinebluesky says:

    I have to agree, wonderful Nosevember pictures and excellent Nosevember poem. I can just about feel the shock of the encounter with the cold Lurking Nose!

  19. Theresa says:

    Accompanied by the famous old German chorale tune “Hier kommt der Villain.”

    (Any PDQ Bach geeks out there?)

  20. ding says:

    *** plants kees on each fuzzy muzzle ***

  21. Boomer's Babysitter says:

    I’m trying to figure out what dog #1 is poking his/her head out from… Do dogs luurkensproinger?

  22. Birdcage says:

    BRILLIANT!!!!!

  23. Acacia says:

    just outing myself as another NTMTOM fan :)

  24. Maribeth says:

    I think #1 is the hot dog dachshund pup inside a slipper…..

  25. emmemm says:

    Doggie noses rule!

  26. artygirl says:

    That is the best Nose Poem ever! Is there no end to the talents of our Guru of Cute?

  27. Kiragirl says:

    Bravoes!

  28. Von Zeppelin says:

    @Boomer’s Babysitter–I believe it’s known as an xtreme turtleneck sweater.

  29. Beth says:

    I love Love LOVE your poem! the noses are cute too!

  30. T.U.M. says:

    @LOLBabyMama – What a sweeeeet beeeeeagle! Beagles are indeed the nosiest of dogs.

  31. Beth says:

    I love Love LOVE your poem! the noses are cute too!

  32. Oliver's Girl says:

    BESTEST POEM EVER!!!!! I am going to read this to my English-lit class.

  33. Edward says:

    The third one looks like my much-missed pooch. Somehow that nose required a full half of the bed.

    In other news, I was mauled by a border collie puppy today. She leapt up on me and barked and sort of fake-nipped at my nose, but surrendered to ear scratching and belly rubs. The owner was very apologetic, but frankly, it was the best part of my day. The fact that I had muddy trousers and a talk to give that afternoon was inconsequential. If a border collie pup wants to show me love, then go right on and leap up.

  34. berthasevant says:

    Excellente as per usual, NTMTOM! Although I wish the chill of Nosevember would hurry up and get to southern California, where all pets are remaining indoors so as to protect their noses and other breathing apparatuseseses.

  35. lurkertype says:

    NOMTOM’s a poet, and he does know it.

    Indeed, it needs a Vincent Price reading. I was so engrossed with the poem I barely noticed the nosicles at first. (then I went back and appreciated them — like the first one best)

  36. Paunchie says:

    beware the chill of the lurking nose! LOL very cute.

  37. PACAT says:

    NOTHING CUTER THEN LITTLE FUZZY NOSES.A KISS ON THE TIP OF THE NOSES

  38. CG says:

    Cute Overload should go into childrens books. Or at least NOMTOM should. He rocks wit da verse!

  39. Ev's mom says:

    YES! This is spectacular, adorable, wonderful, terrific and delightful. Thank you for The. Best. Yet.

  40. ceejoe says:

    It’s very nosevember-ish here in mid-MI. We have snose on the ground…

  41. Katrina says:

    Theresa-”Look –up –her —dress…”

    and “running know, running knows”…

    yes there is at least one PDQ Bach fan out here.

  42. joools says:

    Nose #2 – is that Roofees??

  43. Theresa says:

    @Katrina! Heee! It’s almost time to throw the Yule Log on Uncle John!

  44. Rebecca says:

    We had ‘Tock-tober…now Nose-ember!

  45. Zanna says:

    I don’t normally go in for doggerel, but the dogs justified it in this case. :P

  46. Lesley says:

    (whispers in horror) I’ve got two lurking noses right next to me (eep!)

  47. kgirl says:

    I had a quiet little snigger to myself when I saw this post :)
    This is exactly what my mum and dad’s dog does (quite frankly, he gets treated better than their own children *sigh*). He has a rug on their couch and he likes to put the rug on himself by ‘rooting’ underneath it with his muzzle, tossing the blanket up over his head until it is – more or less – on top of him. *head tilt* ahn….

  48. squidgey says:

    sweet! I made cute overload! pup #3 is my dog Maximus. He’ll be like that all winter long.

  49. sas says:

    @Michelle S – Can I join the fan club?

    We need a “Management Bio” section. :)

    Is anyone else wondering how Theo will incorporate these with the “beep” guy?

  50. Theresa says:

    Madman! We have sealed her living in the tomb!! I hear the beating of the hideous heart!

  51. Furbabies says:

    Most excellent poem, dude! Nice doggie snouts too.

  52. Mary (the first) says:

    Sign me up for the NTMTOM fan club also! This made me LOL at work (usually not a sound we hear around here.. sorry to say.) Wonderful nosies and just perfect for Nosevember.

  53. T.U.M. says:

    Who nose what evil lurks within the noses of dogs? Only the NOMTOM nose!

  54. Theresa says:

    @T.U.M., dog snot, most likely.

  55. Jenn says:

    Great Poem NoMToM! I’m working in Florida this week and it’s turning into a three dog night so the count is perfect! Muah!

  56. Caitlin says:

    My favorite part is #2′s googly eyeball! Oh my.

  57. Theresa says:

    @Joools, I don’t think that’s Roofees– too much white around the nose.

  58. Lillith says:

    Poochie #3 must be an afghan hound…

    What?

  59. Loris says:

    And lo! The chimes of midnight strike!
    A host of noses, all alike!
    Thus speaks the Loris: “Hee! I like
    Not that Mike. But the other Mike!”

  60. Gail (the first one) says:

    Fantastic poem!!!

    Pic #3: When the tails of Nosevember come early….(apologies to Gordon Lightfoot)

  61. PACAT says:

    AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH ALL THESE LURKING NOSES,ME THINK IT’S TIME FOR PROSES

  62. Leilani says:

    Nose #2 looks like our little old man, Scout–a 16.5 yr. old Taco Terrier. The Nose knows!

  63. needapuppy says:

    Fabulous NTMTOM!!!!

    And Theo, today’s UserFriendly comic is for you.

  64. blair says:

    ironicity: i’m listening to Poe singing “beautiful girls” at this very moment

  65. Theo says:

    Sas — have just been too. Darn. Busy.

    Loris — you win a pallid bust of Pallas!

    NeedAPuppy — pshh, you’re telling me. *snork*

  66. AuntieMame says:

    Of course, Hubble photographs have to manipulated to a certain degree, since most of what its cameras capture isn’t in visible wavelengths, so you wouldn’t see anything otherwise. :)

  67. Kimski says:

    I love the Poe reference.

    Funny.

  68. Theresa says:

    Afghan hound, snerkle!

  69. Hon Glad says:

    A similar veiw can be found of me, most weekday mornings. “Urgh it can’t be time to get up, the alarm clocks wrong”.

  70. cheesybird says:

    *sigh*

    I <3 Nosevember.

  71. A thinker says:

    did you write that poem? awesomeness, dude.

  72. ashagato says:

    WOW! so impressed by your talent, NomTom! delightful poem and schnozzes.

    have i told CO lately how much i love you? ;D

  73. Katrina says:

    The question was “Do dogs Lurkensproing?”
    Allow me to give a partial answer to this most important of unimportant questions/topics.

    To lurkensproing an animal needs the ability to plot. If your dog can plot, then well, the first necessity is satisfied. Next said dog needs to be able to wait. IF said waiter is a dog, well then, number B has been accomplished. Now, the third and most crucial, the lurkesproinger needs to able to pounce upon the lurkensproingee at a clip such that the aforementioned lurkensproingee cannot defend it/her/him self. Now, I don’t know any dog [past puppy stage] who can do these, but there must be some plotting, waiting, pouncing full grown dogs out there. Jack Russel (pardon me–Parson Russel Terriers), perhaps? Although waiting just doesn’t fulfill the sterotype.
    I love these noses and the poetry is sublime- or,then maybe higher than sublime
    levelblime or even superblime!

  74. libelula says:

    NTMTOM, you rock. you rock HARD.

    (love the nosicles, too)

  75. pyrit says:

    Who ees dees NOMTOM?
    Vare deed he come from?
    He ees no dum dum.
    He ees not humdrum.
    He has redonksome
    Poem chromosome.
    NOMTOM ees da bomb bomb.

  76. pyrit says:

    Spookeh pics.
    Nosetradogmus!

  77. love the poem! Especially the reference to Poe. :)

  78. Mel2 says:

    Nothin’ like some iambic tetrameter to thrill an English major to the soul.

    I personally have never seen a full-grown dog pull off a successful, textbook luurkenschproing, but I suppose it could be done by some of the nimbler canines out there. I think the classic, four-door luurkenschproing falls primarily to cats. (I did see a ferret pull one off once. It was shocking.)

    Either way, I don’t think any of the dogs in this post has a luurkenschproing on its mind. More like they’re perfecting the Asian martial art of Honk-Shu.

  79. Theresa says:

    Katrina:
    “And he cried out in ANGUISH:
    ‘Oh ye gods, who knows what it is to be lurking? Only he who is lurking nose.
    Lurking nose
    Lurking nose . . .”

    Iphigenia in Brooklyn is my absolute favorite– I especially love the hemiola cadences in the first mvt. ALSO, the first Bargain Counter Tenor is a friend of mine.;)

  80. Jen says:

    Fan-frigging-tastic poem NTMTOM.
    I think someone else may have said that too. . . .

  81. Katrina says:

    Theresa, can he be my friend, too?
    I’ve never heard the whole Iphigenia…much to my dismay.

    PDQ came to Southern CT State University (my alma mater) in New Haven and I thought my laughterer would fall off. Oh, maybe PBS will wise-up and have him for a fund raiser! Big buckaroonies there, let me tell ya! You and I will each give $2, and, oh, yeah…

  82. Theresa says:

    @Katrina: Schickele was a Juilliard classmate of the head of my undergrad music program, and he would come to our Saint Cecilia Days dressed up like St. Cecilia. ;)

    To here all of “Iphegenia”
    Go here:
    http://www.imeem.com/people/QZlzyps/music/4fOS-w63/chamber_orchestra_cantata_iphigenia_in_brooklyn_s_53162/

  83. Megan says:

    Great poem…great pics!

  84. AuntieMame says:

    My favorite PDQ is “The Abduction of Figaro.” Any opera that opens with “Found a Peanut” is A-OK with me. :-)

  85. darkshines says:

    NOMTOM, marry me. You can come live in my familys castle in zee country. Vee have zee best vine…..

  86. Katrina says:

    Theresa and AuntieMame- I am now compelled to revisit and upgrade my PDQ knowledge. Thanks!

  87. Tiffany says:

    Fantastic writing

  88. Xtineebee says:

    Yay! I spies a Basset Nose! And a lovely Basset Backside too. My basset started nose-vember by being bitten by a wasp on his nose; traumatic! And twice as much nose….