Live, Damn You! LIVE!!

"NOOOOOOO! (puff, puff) DON’T LEAVE ME!! (puff, puff) 

I HAVEN’T HAD WALKIES YET! (puff, puff)  AND IT’S ALMOST DINNERTIME! (pounds chest) 

AT LEAST TELL ME (puff, puff) HOW TO WORK (puff, puff)  THE CAN OPENER!! (puff, puff)  NURSE!! I NEED 50 CCs OF ADRENALINE AND A CHEW TOY, STAT!!"

... and don't forget the machine that goes 'ping!'

There was (sigh) nothing we could do, Amanda L.



  1. Puppy bref!!

  2. (The Original) Mel says:

    EMT Pup to the rescue.

    If I ever fall out, I want to be rescued by EMT Pup.

  3. puppies can cure just about anything.

  4. Anhhh. Man’s best friend. :eyebrow:

  5. warrior rabbit says:

    I feel as though I’m intruding on a *very special* moment.

  6. Hilarious!!! Well done, NTMTOM!!

  7. So cute.
    Until, of course, the puppy pulls away, and the man’s face has been shredded by puppy razor-teeth. Let go of the leeps, please.

  8. My favorite doggeh…Rottie. They start out so little and cute! However, a word of advice to hooman…don’t let this darlin’ do this anymore unless you want him to keep doing it when he is a VERY BIG doggeh. Then you might really need CPR!

  9. gravyboat says:


  10. NTMTOM, I literally lol at each of your posts. Well played!

  11. Snout to mouth repupitation! Invaluable in any emergency!

  12. Thank you Dr. Barkus Welby.

  13. omg.. that is too funny.. “I HAVEN’T HAD WALKIES YET!”

  14. ThreeCatNight says:

    Mouf to mouf Re-pupitation!

  15. Look at the size of dose feetz! Dat is gonna be a Doctah, not just a PET (Pupster Emergenceez Tech).

  16. yeahIusePhotoshoptoo says:

    children, don’t try this at home with your big rottie.

  17. OK, ya got me on this one- yes, I laughed, out loud, even.

    Niiiiiiiiic. But the poor guy, I hope he has some lips left after that…ouch.

  18. death by the qte – it’s not a laughing matter.

    … actually, yes it is.

    great pic, great capshuns.

  19. LOL and EWWW puppy spit!!

  20. You see we leased this back from the company we sold it to and that way it comes out of the monthly current budget and not the capital account!

  21. “What are we missing?”

    “The Patient!!!”

    BTW, the size of that paw is scary, scary! However the pup is so cute!

  22. How can I work when great posts like this keep popping up?!

  23. AuntieMame says:

    Heh! Good one, NOMTOM. They’re gonna want to nip this habit in the butt (haw!) pretty sharpish, though, because it won’t be so cute when the doggeh’s mouth is bigger than the dude’s head.

  24. My mini doxie used to do this kind of stuff as a puppy. Although her main concern was more about getting her tongue in your mouth than giving you CPR. *Cringe*

  25. I believe the sound of the artificial breathing machine would be “pocketa-pocketa-queep, pocketa-queep.” And this is an occasion that calls for Mitty’s expertise, if ever there was one!

  26. Boomer's Babysitter says:

    I’ll pass on the puppeh CPR, thanks anyway… 8-P

  27. Silent Meow says:

    I just about died laughing when I first saw this post. Then, I guess I really WOULD need puppeh CPR! LOL!

  28. Outstanding post! I’ve read it three times and crack up each time. And that is one very serious and dedicated-looking puppy EMT! What a cutie – I’d take him home if I could keep him that size.

  29. ghee hee hee!!!! oh, that’s too much…


  30. It just…





  31. HAHAHA completely dying laughing, thank you for helping me to deal with my boring teleconference. I have the phone on mute.

  32. Juniper Jupiter says:


    OH MY GAHD!!!

    That is TOO kyoot!!

    I can’t tell if that’s a hard OR soff kronsche!!

    Either way, I think he took the nose boop WAY too far!

  33. I can’t imagine what those little needle teefs feel like biting into the mouthish area. Yikes!

  34. HA! love the running commentary. (I haven’t had walkies yet!)

  35. Also, I’ve loved Rotties every since I fell in love with one a friend owned. She had a daycare in her home. One day I was looking out into her backyard/playground area, and Samson had the rear axle of a Big Wheel trike in his mouth and was pushing it around the yard! It was pretty hysterical. Big toys for big boys. I think he weighed 110 lbs, and it did NOT feel good when he accidentally stepped on my foot! I luffed him.


    That’s a BTTNF of 11!


    (BTTNF = beverage thru the nose factor)

  37. ok, LMAO at the hovertext…

    gotta love monty python

  38. muttluver says:

    My favorite parts are, “I NEED 50 CCs OF ADRENALINE AND A CHEW TOY, STAT!!”

    And from the commentary, “…thank you for helping me to deal with my boring teleconference. I have the phone on mute.”

    Hilarious! Makes me wish I wasn’t s’posed to be doing school and could laugh out loud…

  39. Love this. My baby girl is part Rottweiler and has similar markings.

    I also love how it’s categorized under “Primates.”

  40. muttluver says:

    P.S. Is it me, or is the puppeh more focused on the bottom-of-nose area than the mouth area? *looks again*

    Yeah, he’s really close to the nose. Ouch.

  41. This would be worse if it were reversed — if the pup was the one being devoured by the mean old human. That would just be sick. As it is, though, it’s so cute!

  42. rottie pups are soooo adorable!

  43. i am soooo envious that this dude gets to take such liberal whiffs of puppy breath. puppy breath can save the world.

  44. yes!! revenge for the dog-eating baby!

  45. Right on, joss. Blech. Puppy spit.

  46. RE: Hovertext, I thought the machine went “Bing!”

  47. Waiting for the pup to break out the defribillator, and shout “CLEAR!”

  48. *ROFLMAO*
    *wipes away tear*
    Nice one, other mike. That made my day 🙂

  49. I’ve always thought that would be the first thing my pups would think about should I kick the bucket.

  50. Selphie le Boffin says:
  51. ROFLMAO….. can’t breathe…. Need Puppeh EMT to give puppeh breath mouth to mouth….. THUD.

  52. The little King Rules!!!!:D and killing me softly 😀 with his wordz 😀

  53. Should have been “…and a breath mint stat!”

    Not that you’r not a genuis or anything. ;D

  54. That is…

    Not that you’re not a genius or anything.


  55. Nancy — I’ve been away from the ‘puter all afternoon (building things with tools, aurrrh hurrh hurrhh) but wow, a Thurber reference? Funny thing — that’s the same sound a Navy hydroplane makes in a hurricane.

  56. NTMTOM – That has to be one of the best you have done – I want me a EMT Pup

  57. Gail (the first one) says:

    @Theresa: I get to do the episiotomy!

  58. librarynerd says:

    Haha, my puppy did this once. 😦 It HURT!
    However, we took care of that bad habit.
    *smirk* So cute tho!!!

  59. Raemie L. says:

    L-O-L at the whole post.

  60. Remember it’s fifteen compressions after the rescue brefs.

  61. Uhhhh……why is this guy so “excited” about what’s going on? I mean, he looks REALLY excited about it, judging from his bulge.

  62. LOVE this…question, what kind of dog is that?

  63. Liz — I think it’s probably a Rottweiler.

  64. so cute so cute so cute :oP
    I want one

  65. LOL funniest post I have seen in a while

  66. yeahIusePhotoshoptoo says:

    it’s all fun and games until someone loses an eye.

  67. Too right, Tank. *NOM*

  68. Oh, sure, where are the nuffers on this one?!? Cruelty to hoomans!

  69. Cruelty to puppy-deprived hoomans!!!! Posting mean stuff like this should be outlawed!!! Nuff nuff nuff…Nope, sorry, can’t do it. It’s cute. Yep. Shore is cute.

  70. Selina's Mommy says:

    and he never even taught his doggy how to work the can opener!! awwwwwwww :<

  71. Big Swami says:

    OMG Rottie pup! One of the bestest kind of doggies out there, but in a tiny, fluffy, rambunctious shape! So cute I could punch myself in the face!

  72. Does anyone else besides me think puppy bref smells like coffee?

    [Heresy! SACRILEGE!! – Ed.]

  73. This is one of the funniest photos I have ever seen. And I’ve seen a lot of funny photos.

  74. Yeah, I saw it still in draft, and was buggin’ Mike to get it posted because I couldn’t wait. FACE NOMMM