"Why, for goodness sakes, it IS a waffle! And to think, when I sat down here, purely at random and for no particular reason, I had no idea that there would be a waffle nearby — and yet, here is a waffle! How mysterious the mechanisms of Fate must seem to someone such as I, who likes a nice waffle on occasion, to find one’s gaze suddenly and for no reason fixed upon … but hark, I think there’s someone at the door! I’ll bet it’s those nice Publisher’s Clearinghouse people with a really big check!"
Riiiiiiiiiiight, Kyle C.