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Is your home or office drowning in documents?  Tame the clutter with PaperCat™ — the revolutionary filing system!  PaperCat is covered with thousands of patented FelineFiber™ micro-hairs that keep important papers under control.  Simply place a document on PaperCat’s patented Cranial Command Center™ …

I file everything under 'M' for 'meow.'

… and like magic, your documents stay put!

Ehhhh ... It's a living.

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Comments

  1. i love how cats just own the world.

  2. May I say YES! I own 2 paper cats and they do a fabulous job. And once everything is perfectly organized, they will come thru and fix your mistakes with the PROPER scatter system recommended by all feline organizers.

  3. No papers stay put when my cats are around. They have their own unique filing system.

  4. Exactly, Jenn!

  5. “Comes with bonus shredding function. Void where prohibited by law.”

  6. I have one of these and all he does is shuffle the papers! He makes a terrible racket and the papers are more ruffled than before. I want my money back! But, I don’t want to give the cat back. :)

  7. My new feline technique is unstoppable.

  8. When properly maintained your papercat will last a lifetime . NO guarantees apply when a mouse is in the room, or you happen to place a document in the system at dinner time.

    Also note: not responsible for any incorrectly shredded documents due to catnip induced malfunction.

  9. I’m currently reading “The World is Flat(tened)” by Mr. Cat Meeowe.

  10. oh, it’s just filing. With the bright glow I thought it was a cat-scanner.

  11. I think my tabby style PaperCat™ is malfunctioning something fierce. It doesn’t file, it lays on anything that sounds like paper. As for shredding…more like chew the corner so it has little bumps and holes.

    Is it supposed to do that? I think I am past warranty…

  12. Gail (the first one) says:

    @jenjen: LOL!!!

  13. Anne Boleyn says:

    Excellent one, jenjen! And, Red, yes it is supposed to do that. It is the startup mode for converting to braille, or sometimes you get an older model that does that keypunch thingy. The latter can be taken to the Antiques Roadshow and be worth lots more than you paid for it but you’ll tell them you want to keep it in the family.

  14. Bertha is the same way, Red, but I think you bought the companion kitteh, which is designed to weigh papers DOWN, not hold onto them from below. It’s a stalagmite/stalactite, AC/DC, Beta/VHS, PS2/XBOX, Mac/PC, Firefox/Chrome kind thing, most cats are wired one way or t’other.

    And Tom (I’ve decided to call NTMTO Mike Tom), is the hovertext a Flintstones callback? Brillo.

  15. Tom — (that’s my new name for NTMTOM) — is the hovertext a Flintstones ref? If so, Brillo.

    And Red, there are two types of kittehs, the kind featured here and the kind you and I have. Bertha is a holder downer not an under grabber. She goes on top of the paper, not vice-versa. It’s a polarity thing, like right-handed or left-handed, Mac/PC, stalagmite/stalactite, Mozilla/Chrome, cake/pie kind of thing, kittehs tend to be one way or t’other.

  16. Oop. I thought the first post had disappeared. Feel free to eliminate one (and this) Teho. Or leave them all and make me look silly.

  17. Not That Mike The Other Mike says:

    @Berthaservant: I suppose it is a “Flintstones” ref. Can’t say it was in the front of my mind, but I’ve seen the show enough times, and they did that gag so many times, so I’m sure it’s floating in my subconscious.

    @jenjen: Thread over — you win. I’M NOT WORTHY!!

  18. – “I file everything under ‘m’ for ‘meow'”–

    ….SNORF! Bahahahaahahahahahaaaaaaa!!! *faints*

    ..

    .

    *pulls self back up to keyboard* *reads hovertext again* SNORF! Baahahahahaaahaaaaa! *faints*

    (repeat as needed)

  19. @Berthaservant: I liked the first post better except for the holder downer – under grabber thing from the 2nd post. That was cute. Actually, now that I think about it, that sounds like some naughty type of geek kink thing, which, actually makes it better. ;)

  20. @Anne Boleyn:

    Braille…yes, I hadn’t thought of that. Antiques Roadshow, I don’t think I have my downtrodden “oh, it’s only worth 5pence.” face quite down yet…I’ll have to keep practicing.

  21. @bertha:
    ahaha, yes, paperweight not papermate…got it. I should have known when I couldn’t find the pen function. My sir is certainly polarsomethingthing. *mumble*

  22. @erebella:
    ‘holder downer-under grabber’ really does sound like a naughty type of geek king thing…I like it. Sounds pretty rawr and like leetsauce twister with neck kerchiefs.

  23. kink not king :P

    although…if there was a geek king…who would claim that throne?

  24. I’ve ordered one in each and every style and I can tell you, people, they are THE BEST at holding the papers. Bar none.

  25. thankyouverymuch… not original of course. There used to be a site in 2002 or so where a guy put up pictures he took by having his cat sit on his scanner. He got a lot of angry mail, which may have been some of the original nuffs along with the bonsai kitty site.

  26. (I mean my cat scan joke was not original. Not that the putting paper on your cat was not original. Ack.)

  27. Is this a polydactyl papercat? I think I own his sister. Is he named Otis?
    P

  28. Now, that’s a pretty kitty!! Love the white muzzlepowche and blackness all round. Can I have an Aaawwwww!

  29. knightofmonarch says:

    Pictured is the standard two colored model – Also available in other styles and colors to match any decor.

  30. Note the strong resemblance to the Great Oh Don Piano Cat!!! Coincidence– or is this occupational therapy for the poor guy?

  31. My late beloved Heather (who died at the age of 19 about 10 years ago) used to have a penchant for paper-punch duties. Pretty much all my paperback books were perforated at the lower or upper right-hand corner. Every once in awhile I pull a book off the shelf and find her trademark kronsche. Just a reminder that she’s still with me.

  32. Red, the corner ‘chewing’ is really the ‘staple-less stapler’ function. Should be in the manual, 5-23 or thereabouts.

    And Theresa, mention of our favorite Oh Don Piano gave me my first guffaw of the day. Many thanks!

  33. warrior rabbit says:

    jenjen, I remember the site. It was funny! He had articles written about it and everything. Earlier than 2002, more like 1997. (Remembering what job I was at when I found it.) Too bad, the nuffers claimed another victim.

  34. Red, at least OUR Geek King would have to be Berthaservant. No contest. We do love him.

    Yeah, thanks Theresa for that reminder. “Oh Don Piano………why I eyes ya!” Mmm, good times.

  35. Yes, yes, I see that this model can handle my black-and-white documents. Will I have to invest in the Calicollator for my full-color prints?

  36. (the original) Mel says:

    I too was thinking that this might be Don Piano. I work at home, so I definitely need one of these. My marmalade tabby model is a useless book gnawer.

  37. Yes, Berthaservant would be our Geek King, you’re so right Erebella.

  38. @SoCalSis: Hmmm…stapleless stapler…yes, that seems to be the case. I opened up the lid a bit and checked ‘im out. Seems he doesn’t even have a little slot for staples. Tuna breath yes, staples, no.

  39. Anne Boleyn says:

    And you mean that Berthaservant is our Geek King in the best possible way, mais non?

  40. scooterpants says:

    Lurker- SNORT! callicollator. good one.

  41. I would like an all white model please! Perhaps a marmie model as well…

    My boy Marcus would love to lay on top of any paper I was reading, I believe he falls into the holder-downer catagory. *sigh* I miss him terribly

  42. My Stinky is clearly a holder-downer, and Dante is an under-grabber. That concerns me a bit– does that mean that Stinky is a “top” and Dante is a “bottom”?

  43. Very cute tux kitty– the lopsided white gives him a sort of “Whatever…” look.

    My Robin is frequently on the desk but he files everything on the floor, including the paper rack and the phone.

  44. Space Cowgirl says:

    I love big fluffy tuxedo kittehs. Why can’t I have one? Want!

  45. True story: A friend of mine was working on a short story but was stuck. She works “organizationally”, so she had pieces of paper with story elements (characters, plot lines, etc.) written on them and spread them out on the floor. Frustrated, she called it a night and went to bed. Next morning the papers were rearranged, thanks to her two tabbies, and it all came together and she finished the story. The kittehs got a treat for that.

  46. Mary (the first) says:

    OMG look at those WHISKERS! I love them. I want that cat. Seriously!!

  47. Awww, geek king. You sure know how to make a fella feel pretty special ’round here.

  48. momof2kitties says:

    Oh, B-serv…you know you have an entire fan club of smitten females around these parts…

    *swoon!*

  49. Whenever my Melanie tries to eat a book, I tell her it’s not the Reader’s Digest.

  50. Gail (the first one) says:

    Count me in the fan club (shall we get t-shirts?), momof2!!

    @Berthaservant: Geek king—in the best possible, PhD-holding, Marmie-loving, trivia-knowing way!!

    @Desdemona: My Patty (who lived to 16, gone 10 years now) did the same thing and like you, every once in awhile I come across a paperback where she left her mark!! My newest, the 5 month old, is carrying on the same tradition!! Kind of embarassing to lend a book that’s been pre-tasted!!

  51. momof2kitties says:

    Yes, yes!! T-shirts!! And mouse pads! And bumper stickers!

    “B-serv for Pres.”

    “I brake for Bertha”.

    “Berthaservant is my man”

    Stuff like that!

    \o/

  52. momof2kitties says:

    I own the office suite of one floor filer and one holder-downer. Very attractive they are!! But not so helpful…

  53. Why does the full-feline-face-front shot remind me of Adam Savage from Mythbusters? . . .

  54. Must be the glasses & red hair.

  55. Just what the hip newgen office needs, what with the high tech, the black and white color scheme and such.

    jenjen-I bow before you. I laughed and winced at the same time!

    Berthaservant- how’s the search going? Anything in wonderful Connecticut?
    As I recall from my days of living under the dominion of a cat, they supply their own static electricity, too. I remember puddy-tat paw marks on my homework to be handed in. Most profs laughed.

  56. Desdemona, my Murphy does that to book covers. Nearly all of my graphic novels have been Murphy-approved. And when we wrap Christmas gifts and put them beneath the tree, we can’t put bows on them until we are ready to give them to their recipients, lest the bows also bear the marks of Murphy’s inspection.

  57. @Desdemona: I could not even put out present until right before my family came over, because my Marcus had to *inspect and try* everything. This went on for 8 years.

  58. opps… I ment to say that to Noelegy.

    Sorry about that.

  59. JenJen in cleveland says:

    As soon as I saw this picture I was also reminded strongly of the “Oh don piano, why I eyes ya!” cat! Good times indeed!! ;o)

  60. Wow…more love. Thanks, everyone.

    Ironically (in the truest sense of the word), a supposedly good friend the other night laid into me (in front of our friends) for being a nerd who did nothing but sit around and watch movies all day (which is not technically true). And she did it in front of a girl I liked, shrinking my proverbial manhood to nothing and pretty much reducing me to a really pathetic person. I know, I know, this isn’t the place…anyway, I just like knowing things so I can share them with other people and then they can know them too. What I know is not nearly as important as how I feel. Which, right now, is pretty crappy.

    But better since I checked back to this thread. I wish my real life world were more like it is here, just a little bit.

    [...mrhmm? Sorry, uh, I kinda went off on a mental tangent right about when you said "laid" - Ed.]

  61. momof2kitties says:

    But, but…I sit in awe of your vast fountain of movie trivia! I don’t know 10% of what you know!

    And, although we have never met, I count you as a friend I enjoy, and look forward to reading each day.

    So your dumb other “friend” can put that in her pipe and smoke it. Meh!

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