Please Do Not Climb the Otter

by Theo on August 4, 2008

Welcome, welcome one and all, to Minnesota’s Fergus Falls!

Home of The Otters!

We got otter football, otter softball, otter pops, otter sculpture…
Big_Otter_Fergus_Falls

…oh fer cryin.  We got otter tourists.  [sigh]
Mod_on_otter_head

Not to be too smug, but how jealous are our friends at CuteOtters.com now, eh??  Grins.

{ 98 comments }

1 Chelsea 08.04.08 at 11:46 pm

That’s bitchin’.

2 Jen 08.04.08 at 11:46 pm

He will use that man to crack an oyster open.
Or crack that man open with a rock.

3 amyj 08.04.08 at 11:49 pm

I never noticed otters have two sets of whiskers. Does anyone know anything about that?

4 Ruth 08.04.08 at 11:57 pm

Oh, fer qte!!!!

5 scooterpants 08.04.08 at 11:57 pm

hmmm. i guess the ’stay off the otter’ sign kinda went right by Theo there.
what a rebel.

Glad I waited, it was SO worth it! this might be my next vaca destination!
Fabulous!

6 charliewabba 08.05.08 at 12:03 am

omigosh – imagine if it had real otter fur.

7 Gail (the first one) 08.05.08 at 12:32 am

Can it be?? Photographic evidence of the existance of the legendary Teho and Jaye??? ALERT THE MEDIA!!!

GREAT otter!!!!

P.S. Birnamwood WI, is the home of the Giant Badger:
http://www.roadsideamerica.com/tip/1425

8 Lizzy 08.05.08 at 12:40 am

@Charliewabba – If it had real fur, you would have to use the jaws of life to stop me from snorgling it!

Teho, once again, you rock my (non-ferrety) socks.

9 turbofloof 08.05.08 at 12:42 am

Ahhhhhh, one of the Table-Eaters, lyin’ on the head of one of the Tummy-Eaters… What is the world comin’ to?!

10 (the original) Mel 08.05.08 at 12:43 am

OTTERZEEE!!!1!!(one)

11 Yitzysmommie 08.05.08 at 12:57 am

MOST excellebt pic! Thanks you, Teho & Jaye for sharing your vacayshe with us.

12 momof2kitties 08.05.08 at 12:57 am

When will the DVD “Moderators Gone Wild” be released? I, for one, must have eet!!

13 KT 08.05.08 at 12:57 am

Oh! Some of my family lives there! I probably have childhood pictures at that otter!

14 (the original) Mel 08.05.08 at 1:05 am

I propose an annual Cutologist pilgrimage to the GIANT EVIL OTTER monument.

15 Alexis 08.05.08 at 1:10 am

Theo, how long do you think it would take me to get to the wondrous Fergus Falls from St Louis Park? I am heading to the Twin Cities in two weeks to visit the in-laws, and now I am wondering if a day trip is in order…

16 Alexis 08.05.08 at 1:12 am

Damn, just looked at the map. Wish the in-laws still lived in Fargo. Looks like a quicker trip.

17 Theo 08.05.08 at 1:17 am

Alexis — nominally 3 hours, but that stretch of I-94 between the Cities and St. Cloud is almost always a damn parking lot, at least in spots. Skip it if at all possible. Once you’re safely past St. Cloud, you can use 94 again.

18 fish eye no miko 08.05.08 at 1:18 am

Apparently Theo doesn’t know what he otter do.

19 Silly Mama 08.05.08 at 1:22 am

What the…?! How did he get up there?! Does that otter have giant steps on the back of his neck or is scalingk otter heads the newest rage with you kids these days?

[By laying a finger aside of my nose, and being Teh Mod™, up the otter I rose... - Ed.]

20 hey-h 08.05.08 at 1:28 am

Yep. This is why I love Minnesota.

21 Katrina 08.05.08 at 1:28 am

Oh, Theo (Oh Jayne)
It is as I pictured, um you are as I pictured, too.

Now stay off the damned otter like they told you, will ya? Sheesh!

22 Alexis 08.05.08 at 1:31 am

Thanks, Theo. I think it may have to wait for another trip. One during which gas prices are lower (HA!). But I’m so glad I know it exists now!!

23 sas 08.05.08 at 1:35 am

Me thinks that pic #2 is a prime example of interspecies snorgling. ;D

24 Sam 08.05.08 at 1:48 am

Not to brag, but Minnesota (my home) is also the home to a giant prarie chicken, fish, black duck, a blue ox, and a turkey. And one state over, North Dakota, has the worlds largest cow, buffalo, crane and a giant pheasent. Things get really crazy up here.

25 Kara 08.05.08 at 2:00 am

That’s not an otter, it’s a ferret!

(jk)

26 muttluver 08.05.08 at 2:05 am

So that’s what Theo looks like…

I was once going to stay in a hotel shaped like a dog, but I was too young at the time. :( It made me sad.

27 Theresa 08.05.08 at 2:13 am

And Wisconsin is the home of the Giant Muskie.

28 Theresa 08.05.08 at 2:18 am

AND Denver has a HUGE blue (yes blue) bear, peering into the Convention Center:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/ethomsen/148894381/

29 lurkertype 08.05.08 at 2:33 am

Did you guys see actual live otterz??

30 library_nerdypants 08.05.08 at 2:46 am

omfg, proof that Teho actually exists!!!!!

31 Tia 08.05.08 at 2:48 am

Heh. I went to high school there. I WAS an Otter.

32 Tina Rhea 08.05.08 at 3:01 am

AmyJ– cats have two sets of whiskers– mostly on the muzzle, and a few on the cheeks, plus the eyebrows sticking up. And a few on the back of the wrists too. Don’t know about dogs– don’t have one handy.

Sam– so I’m guessing there’s not a lot to do or visit in MN and ND…?

33 Tina Rhea 08.05.08 at 3:02 am

Sam, that WAS meant as a joke.

34 Patty 08.05.08 at 3:28 am

All we have is the world’s largest ball of twine.
http://skyways.lib.ks.us/towns/Cawker/twine.html

35 Theo 08.05.08 at 3:40 am

Patty — a’HEM
http://www.roadsideamerica.com/story/2128

(OK OK, we *both* have the biggest twineball, depending…)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Biggest_ball_of_twine

36 berthaservant 08.05.08 at 4:32 am

Yay, Teho! You show that fake otter who is boss!

37 AuntieMame 08.05.08 at 5:48 am

Ah yes, the Blue Bear…

We also have this ridiculous eyesore:

http://www.denvergov.org/Portals/539/images/TA_dancers.jpg

38 Martha in Washington 08.05.08 at 5:58 am

Theo-you look as funny as you sound.
No wait, that came out wrong!!

39 Subhangi 08.05.08 at 6:24 am

::wide eyes::

ZOMG! As if the Guthrie Theatre wasn’t reason enough. I must visit thees place!

40 Hon Glad 08.05.08 at 6:57 am

Pardon my ignorance but the twin cities are Minnesota and ?
Theo: Come now, that’s not dignified for a man of your age, supposing the neighbours veiw CO. :o }

41 cheesybird 08.05.08 at 8:49 am

Wait. Giant otterz AND the illustrious Theo and Jaye? CO double whammy!! You guys are as cute as the otter! (Although granted, I don’t want to beep either of your noses. Is it weird that I still kinda wanna beep the giant fake otter’s nose?)

Sadly, I don’t live anywhere near any giant stuff. Things here are more on the “wee” end of the spectrum.

42 starling 08.05.08 at 10:05 am

Isn’t there somewhere with big dinosaurs too? Near Mesa Verde, perhaps? I can’t quite remember the name, I was 10 at the time and now I’m mumblemumble years older.

43 Basilania 08.05.08 at 10:09 am

THIS is a perfect example of why I love road trips! All this funk you inevitably pass along the way, that tickles your imagination ;D

44 Gail (the first one) 08.05.08 at 10:27 am

@Hon Glad: The Twin Cities are Minneapolis and Saint Paul.

45 Darleenie 08.05.08 at 11:04 am

It should be CuteOtterload!

Amirite? XD

46 Reber 08.05.08 at 11:07 am

Huh, never thought our little podunk Fergus would get on the map! Check out Rothsay, with the world’s largest Prairie Chicken, or Vergus, with the world’s largest Loon (the bird, not the residents!!!) We Minnesooodans are well known for our giant animals!

47 Theresa 08.05.08 at 11:38 am

Yup, they grow ‘em big up north.

I live about a hundred miles from the BIG DUCK!:
http://www.roadsideamerica.com/story/2173

48 Katrina 08.05.08 at 11:45 am

Tia- Testify girl, testify!

See how well your Otterdom (Otterhood?)has prepared you for this?!

I for one, would love to see the giant prarie chicken-is it inflated or flat chested? Oh, maybe those are Guinea Fowl…. hmmm SQUAWK!!!!

49 ButtaRumCake 08.05.08 at 11:48 am

Aww Theo thanks for sharing! I can only imagine Jaye must have the wickidest of humor senses to hang with you on a daily, eh? *giggles*

50 J. Bo 08.05.08 at 12:29 pm

I am proud beyond belief to have contributed to the Otter-mania and badgering http://www.weebls-stuff.com/toons/badgers/ of Teho into posting his vacation pics.

51 J. Bo 08.05.08 at 12:30 pm

P.S. You and Schmoop are SO CUTE!

52 chanpon 08.05.08 at 1:10 pm

Oh noes! Teh evil otters has got Teho!

53 Theo 08.05.08 at 1:21 pm

Eh? I thought it was the other way around.

54 lizzums 08.05.08 at 1:41 pm

Hey! You should come to Alabama and check out the Big Boll Weevil.

Wait… on second thought…don’t.

55 Eastie 08.05.08 at 1:42 pm

Haha…That’s awesome!

56 DKN 08.05.08 at 1:48 pm

I’m really glad to know I’m not the only one who assumed that this was theo and the infamous schmoop.

["Infamous"?? - Ed.]

57 Katrina 08.05.08 at 1:58 pm

Said with a Mid-West, Scandinavian accent, please)

“Now, dat’s your blue bear, dere, and he’s a nosy son-of-gun, too!”

58 Kidd&Troost 08.05.08 at 2:05 pm

When I was a kid we always went to Vernal, Utah for summer vacations, so I have many many pictures of me and my brothers next to giant dinosaur sculptures. Good times…

http://www.roadsideamerica.com/dino/dino2.html

59 charliewabba 08.05.08 at 2:25 pm

umm- North Carolina has a giant chair. Specifically the world’s largest Duncan Phyfe chair. http://www.roadsideamerica.com/set/CIVIchair.html
And a very large chest of drawers. http://www.roadsideamerica.com/story/2148
not nearly as cute as otter.

60 charliewabba 08.05.08 at 2:29 pm

@Silly Mamma – I suppose you could start your ascent at the tail, work your way along the back and establish a base camp at the bottom of the neck, then with your trusty sherpas for support, work your way up to the summit. Teho, did you plant a CO flag atop the otter head?

61 Erebella 08.05.08 at 2:34 pm

That’s you Teho????? I wondered what you looked like. You’re silly! I love it! How long did it take you to scramble up on that otter’s head? Oh, that’s just so cute! I give you beeg kees!

62 chanpon 08.05.08 at 3:06 pm

You’re right. Theo’s handing it to the otter right now. I should’ve put ‘Teh evil otters has got Ed!’

No, I’m not making fun of anyone who thought there was an Ed, because that would include me at one point. (-_-)

63 Theresa 08.05.08 at 3:13 pm

@Katrina- BWAHAHAHA!
I think it should be “and he’s a nosy son-of-a-gun, too, doncha know.”

You know the official name of the Blue Bear is “I See What You Mean.” I always wonder if that’s suppoed to be what the conventioneers are saying about the bear, or what he’s saying about them. ;)

64 taj 08.05.08 at 4:01 pm

well… in CA… we, um, have the world’s largest ocean!

65 taj 08.05.08 at 4:03 pm
66 Kris 08.05.08 at 4:13 pm

Reading through all these comments, I’m wondering what Maryland has…? Biggest @sshole driver population (into DC of course)? And then I click on the Roadside America site, and what does Maryland have???? a Museum of Menstruation!!!!!!!
http://www.roadsideamerica.com/story/2116
Lawd hep me.

67 Katrina 08.05.08 at 4:26 pm

Theresa-Yup, uh, huh, that’s what it shouldabeen alright, uh-huh.

Thanks, Theresa!

taj, oh come on, you have the Monteray Bay Aquarium-that is, hands down, the coolest, most spiffiest, most bestest place in the world. You can’t even enter the race-’cause you have an advantage that is impossible to beat. I wanna go baaaack!

68 Katrina 08.05.08 at 4:36 pm

OK, Kris, I read the entire story of Harry and his Musuem.

It would be nice to have a Women’s Health museum somewhere, maybe a med school or something. But the writing of the article was obnoxious.

Maybe some day it will become part of a larger Women’s Health initiative, and people will become more familiar with the social implications of Women’s Health issues. That’s what I took away from it, anyway. The museum is now closed. AAAAAAHHHH-GAAAAHHN Nowwwww.

69 scooterpants 08.05.08 at 4:46 pm

kris- say it isnt so, but its kinda strange, like trying not to look at a car wreck or something. what an odd man, dont know if i can get past that.

well, up here in vancouver washington we have a lotta, big…. rain and water and hills and mountains and green stuff, like trees and crap. its reel purdy. :)

70 Jaye 08.05.08 at 4:49 pm

Katrina, maybe it could re-open intermittently…like 5 days out of every 28? ;)

71 scooterpants 08.05.08 at 4:51 pm

oh katrina! i thought the writing was HILLarious! i about snorted coffee out my nose three times. You need to learn to ‘go with the flow girl!’
you’ll be ‘cursed’ if ya dont!
its about ‘that time of the month’ for you to lighten up have a giggle. :) (snort!,gaffaw! i kill me)

72 Theo 08.05.08 at 4:55 pm

Could we, you know, maybe steer this thread back onto topic? Even such as it was? There was a giant fibercrete otter, if I recall correctly…

73 Kris 08.05.08 at 5:04 pm

What, you think Menstruation isn’t cute, Theo? Huh? HUH? HUH?????????

74 scooterpants 08.05.08 at 5:05 pm

we did dI-gress a lil.
yes, yes Fabulous photos
of the giant Otter, and those people (who could they be????) , and I love all the links to other great goofy tourist stuff.

75 Kris 08.05.08 at 5:07 pm

Jaye – that sounds like the PERFECT suggestion!!!

P.S. Nice “meeting” you & Theo! :o )

76 scooterpants 08.05.08 at 5:07 pm

bah!ha ha! kris! LOL LOL LOL, bout peed my pants…

77 Silly Mama 08.05.08 at 5:08 pm

@charliewabba – I dunno if a sherpa would be a good idea. Don’t they have spikes on their shoes or sumpthing? Ouch!

Heehee. Mt. Otterest

78 charliewabba 08.05.08 at 5:21 pm

well, for purposes of otter-scaling, I suppose the sherpas could have something like the hook-y half of velcro on their boots.

79 SarahR 08.05.08 at 5:35 pm

Teho, your pics would be *much* better than the one that currently represents the Big O on Flickr’s The Big Things pool: http://www.flickr.com/photos/joshmattson/396026441/

[fixed the URL... - Ed.]

80 Katrina 08.05.08 at 6:20 pm

We’re making the menfolk umcomfortabihls, but Jaye, Kris- we do think alike.

I’m still chuckling, here, thankfull for the fact that Theo and his snuggle-puff have given us these lovely photos of the Giant Otter.

PHTPTUTHTHTTPTHTTH!
I’m tearing up again, Oh, God, I can win for losing here! TPTHTPTUTPTHHTH! (insertsmileyfacehere)

81 Katrina 08.05.08 at 6:24 pm

Nope, no stairs on that Otter from where I’m sittin’.
Theo did it the HARD way.

*Snort*

[You underestimate the power of teh Mod side... - Ed.]

82 Jaye 08.05.08 at 7:04 pm

The gagging sounds are me reacting to “snuggle-puff”…egghhhh, acckkkk, ptui!

And while Theo’s climbing prowess is legendary, the picnic table on the far side of the otter might’ve helped just a little ;)

83 Theo 08.05.08 at 7:07 pm

WUMPKINDOODLE!

84 Theo 08.05.08 at 7:10 pm

PS — that is a picnic table of unspeakable power. It is not to be trifled with.

85 charliewabba 08.05.08 at 7:44 pm

wumpkindoodle?

86 scamps 08.05.08 at 9:38 pm

You totally need to help me plan a cute-animal-themed honeymoon!

87 Theresa 08.05.08 at 10:33 pm

@Katrina, yah, you betcha!

88 Theresa 08.05.08 at 10:38 pm

@Kris, no, that would be Florida. Trust me. I know it doesn’t seem fair, since they also have the Weeki-Wachi Mermaids:
http://mermaid.weekiwachee.com/

89 Theresa 08.05.08 at 10:41 pm
90 Katrina 08.06.08 at 1:23 pm

Theresa- you are one very funny woman. Now Kris, as one very funny woman to another, you have to read Theresa’s link for Theo: and here is my favorite passage-”I was just idly rearranging flint sickle blades that had already been catalogued. Apparently, I spelled out the true name of a long-dead god-priest,” Whitson said. “Can’t a man even clean up his work area without inadvertently conjuring up a pack of lightning-breathing ocelots?”

I have to take a nap now, and I swear if I dream about lightening-breathing ocelots, you are going to hear ALL about it.

Theo- my husband and children have to deal with “snugglepuff” and faaaar worse, (‘woozysnuggle’ and more), so Jaye can buck up.
Ok Jaye? (slinks off in fear of Jaye)…

91 Theo 08.06.08 at 2:41 pm

I’ve seen that Onion piece, and it *is* funny; what I don’t get is why Theresa specifically posted that one here…?

92 taj 08.06.08 at 4:04 pm

Katrina, I know CA has tons of attractions, but I was thinking more along the line of roadside features that have the title “the world’s largest [insert random object here].”

In Hollywood, I bet we have the world’s largest egos!

93 zeldapie 08.06.08 at 4:10 pm

HOORAY! The Fergus Falls OTTER!!
My dad grew up in Fergus, and we’d visit grandma there quite often. Going to see the OTTER was a highlight, lemme tell ya.

HOORAY!

94 catloveschanel 08.06.08 at 6:20 pm

I had to Cuteoverload @ work after a dubious experience, and it was a quiet moment.

Then I saw the 2nd Caption ” Oh fer cryin… ” and I laughed so loud, I blew my cover.

I think my uncle always used to say that, I can just see him …

95 joools 08.06.08 at 7:01 pm

@Theo: I think Theresa was linking the article to the PTOUP (Picnic Table of Unspeakable Power), and to you, our very own “Minnesota Jones and the Otter of Fibercrete”. What I don’t get is, if you’re supposed to stay off the otter, why did they put it in a sandbox like a play structure??

[LOL, yes, OK, I get it now, thanks... - Ed.]

[For the record, I never actually saw any sort of warning sign. And that table is aluminum, so, very strong but very light. Somebody had definitely moved it there, and it wasn't me... - Ed.]

96 warrior rabbit 08.06.08 at 7:16 pm

taj, we also have the world’s biggest lemon. http://www.roadsideamerica.com/story/9782 I don’t think the article explains, but it’s left over from a Rose Parade.

Driven by it many times. Never tried to climb it.

97 Katrina 08.07.08 at 12:07 pm

taj- you may be right!

98 Theo 08.07.08 at 2:50 pm

I dunno, Katrina; drive 6 hours up the coast & you’re in Cupertino… ;-)

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