How to have a lazy Sunday in 8 easy steps

STEP 1:  Be a wolverine.
Wolverine_1

STEP 2:  Know that you are a badass predator.  Choose to chill.
Wolverine_2

STEP 3:  Be a leopard.
Amur_up

STEP 4:  You are the elitest of the elite.  You are the eyeblink of death.  You are death from above.  You come from Mongol-flocking Siberia.  Let the camera-clutching tourists squeal and flail and gibber.  They are tender and delicious.  You can afford to chill.
Amur_down

STEP 5:  Be a tiger.
Tiger1

STEP 6: <snort>
STEP 6a: Leopards.  Afraid of water.  Honestly.  Come, I will show you the Way of Chill.
STEP 6a1: Come closer.
Tiger2

STEP 7:  Be a bear.  Better be two bears, in fact.  Be TWO RIGGA-DAM’ GRIZZLY BEARS, pilgrim!
Grizzlies

STEP 8:  You know the drill.
frisky_Grizzlies

Thanks to the Minnesota Zoo and their new Minnesota Trail and Grizzly Coast exhibits!  They’ve really been working on the place; even the run-through fountains in the play area are back.  Sadly, they didn’t have any grizzly cubs for us to take pictures of, which was too bad because that would’ve been just about THE ULTIMATE Cute Overload post.  They’re working on it, though.

Comments

  1. Great idea, animules!
    *head to desk* ….zzzzzzz

  2. Nothing can make sleeping quite so cute as a giant kitty. And this one time at the Toronto Zoo we watched the Siberian tiger go for a dip in his pond, though it wasn’t nearly as gloriously blue as this. I firmly believe my kitty is part tiger, given his penchant for splashing in the water dish.

    And if you look to the left, you will see leopard leopardus displaying a truly quintessential axis of snorgling. Mmm soft leopard fur.

    [I’m sure the leopard is saying the same about you, more or less… – Ed.]

  3. Nicely done, Theo! Who knew apex predators could be so cuddly!

  4. lol at the caption on step 8

  5. Gail (the first one) says:

    Wonderful Sunday advice!!! I particularly enjoyed the hovertext on Step 3—it matches the picture purrrfectly!

    (and has anyone tried Dippin’ Dots? I’ve been seeing them for years as a ‘franchise oppty’ and recently are showing up in the grocery store…..)

    [I’ve heard they tend to get caught between your claws, then they melt, so your toehawk gets all sticky just where it’s hard to lick it clean. And they don’t even have liver flavor… – Ed.]

  6. Excellent cuteporting from the road, Teho!!!! Best hovertext is “My mustelid sense is tingling!”

    Chillaxin to the maxin on a weekend. Good plan!

  7. Step 9: Be my grey and white housecat, Mr. Stinky Fuzzpantaloons, who waited for me to get up so he could climb into my bed for a Sunday afternoon snoozle.

  8. Okay Teho Thanks for a Sunday morning snort, Chuckle, and Guffaw at Photo Eight caption, Picture, and Roll over.

    This whole post is a WIN.. Dipping dots::: Giggle

  9. Hey! I was looking through here and was thinking “This totally looks like the Minnesota Zoo” which I frequent often. Yay for living a mile from the zoo!

  10. Beth (in NC) says:

    There aren’t any grizzly babies…. yet! ;)

    I’m doing my best to start a mantra: “BE the wolverine! BE the leopard!” etc. Hopefully it’ll be so strong that it will cause great chillage, and all will be good.

    ‘Sup my bitches.

  11. Ashley Marie says:

    YAY! Go Minnesota Zoo and all its cute animals!

  12. crinklefish says:

    You have made my Lazy Sunday.

    I’m currently on Step Wolverine.

    Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…….chillaxed.

    -K

  13. (the original) Mel says:

    I take step 4, step 6a, skip to step 8, then return to step 4.

  14. looks like they’s gonna have some grizzly cubs in about 6-9 months

    i say we come back in spring and see if we can’t update the c to the o

  15. Do I see some wolverine Pilates action?

  16. You’re not really chilling unless you’re capable of killing and eating everyone around you, but instead you stretch out and snooze.

    Top notch, Teho!

    I am the eyeblink of death . . . zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

  17. Wonderful photography.
    Dippin’ dots..yes, here at Lake Compounce-(and that name has to count for something towards Luurkesproinging), Dippin’ Dots are touted as “The ice cream of the Future!”.
    I had the green ones with little brownish flecks in them. I’m told it was mint chocolate chip. It didn’t taste like what I would imagine scat would taste like on first spoon, so I ate it all. “Curiously refreshing”, as they say.

    Gotta go it is a very nice Sunday here and there are two madmen shredding, I mean trimming, the foundation plantings. I wonder how long it will be until they cut the power cord this time? They usually last a little longer than I would.

  18. lifecoach says:

    ROFL Theo!

    I am a badass predator.
    I choose to chill.
    Alas I have to work on the weekend.
    Foiled.

  19. Totalee Puppy says:

    Hovertext by Theo…so enjoyabuls!

    [EVERYTHING by Theo, this time. Hehe… – Ed.]

  20. “Mongol-flocking”, eh? :)

    “Rigga-dam”? :o

    Umm, err, arent’ those two grizzies, er…;))))))))

  21. mom2twinzz says:

    They all look so content on a lazy summer day. Unlike the ones at the Columbus Zoo who are WAAAAYYY to up close and personal with people. (Gorillas chasing kids from the windows).
    Although it reminds me next weekend I HAVE to take the camera and take pictures in the Kangaroo exhibt – they let ya walk through it. We were about 2 feet from one.

  22. Aw, I live in Minneapolis and LOVE the Minnesota Zoo! They have AMAZING exhibits and the sweetest little animals. If wolverines weren’t so vicious, I would totally snorgle them. =)

  23. OMG, are those bears HUMPING?? There are children watching!! :D

  24. Well, what do YOU do on Sundays?

  25. This was from last Sunday, right? ‘Cause it looks like you had an awesomely relaxed birfday, Theo.

    [Actually, yes, it was. Good call… – Ed.]

  26. still trying to figure out how to morph into not one but two bears…hmmmmm…

  27. scooterpants says:

    Fengli- you are so adorables- “one time at band camp” *snort* tee hee
    Theo ,fab piktur taken! (theo monopolizzes the post this time- eggsellent)
    those grizzles are just wrestlin right? WHUT??
    its so flippin hot here ( and muggy,) i’m doin the Tiger action. enjoy your sunnycoot day all-

  28. scooterpants says:

    ps.
    well if we’re ALL doin it on sunday, arent we gunna knock the earth off its axes?
    we better lean the other way for a whiles. :)
    somethin to ponder.

  29. We ain’t ALL doing it on Sunday. Some of us have kids!

  30. Angela-Eloise says:

    You at me at “BE a wolverine.”

    Bwahahahahahahaha!

  31. this post made me lol so hard.

  32. darkshines says:

    I wish I could relax on a Sunday, I’ve been at work all day, cleaning the most disgusting things :(

  33. gravyboat says:

    Those fuzzies can’t relax like me, eatin’ bacon and eggs in my underwear. Oh wait. That tiger is swimmin’ in the buff. Dammit!

  34. I saw this most chilled-owted ring-tailed lemur yesterday. It was sitting right in the middle of the footpath, with its tail wrapped around it like a scarf, going “duuuuuuuude” while people were tripping over it.

  35. I took a pikchoor of it, actually, I might send it to CO, if they want it.

  36. I just went to the Minnesota Zoo two weeks ago. Proof! …

    http://midgard.deviantart.com/gallery/#Critters

    It was hot out and all the animals were like “meh, today is our day off, mr. clicky silver box.”

    [Midgard — those photos of yours on DA are really good. And it looks like we only missed you by one weekend, heh… – Ed.]

  37. Oh Theo, that was wonderful…sigh…CO has done it again!!

  38. Totalee Puppy says:

    Gotta love the attitude…Theocity!

  39. mom2twinzz says:

    Midgard – I love your art – it is GOR-GEOUS If I have half the talent that you have in your little finger I would be so happy.

  40. scooterpants says:

    wow starling . good to know. so i guess al gore was right about gllllllllobbb..aaalll warmin after all, i thought it might be all of us screwin at the same time.
    bah hahah.
    you tellin me your kids run your world??? din’int ,not , no way , happen in my folks life time. they can justify.
    word.

  41. Thanks mom :)

  42. Theo for the WIN!

  43. I thought the bears were reading the Sunday newspaper together-although I hate people reading over my shoulder…..

  44. LOL, Katrina. XD

  45. Chelonianmobile says:

    Ah, wolverines … genuine proof that a non-cute mustelid is physically impossible. They can rip the legs off horses and drive wolves away from their kills, but they look like big floofy dog/teddy bear/weasel things.

  46. still trying to figure out how to morph into not one but two bears…hmmmmm…

  47. uh…that tingling in your mustelid sense?

    ….they make an ointment for that.

  48. Well sheeeit, I’m-a git me some.

  49. It was pretty funny at the bear enclosure, because at first Mr. Bear approached Ms. Bear face-to-face, and did some “hugging” gestures. So of course the whole crowd of human onlookers is going “Awwwww, look, Junior, the bears are playing!”

    And then, when the bears had everybody’s FULL attention…

  50. I just wanted to add myself to the “wanna hug the wolverine” camp. Go ahead and add me to the bear camp, too.

    No, not THOSE bears. I mean the big fat hairy ones who drool a bit. No, the other ones. In the zoo. In the enclosure.

  51. Well isn’t that nice of the bears to give us a lesson in snuggling Snicker.

  52. Nice snaps Theo.
    The bears picture, reminds me of the late Noel Cowards explanationn of a similar situation with two dogs,when asked by his Nephew what they were doing.
    ‘Well dear boy, the dog in front is blind and the one at the back is pushing his friend, all the way to St Dunstans’ (a home for the blind).

    [Like a shopping cart! Or, more appropriately, a pram? – Ed.]

  53. SQUEEEEEEEEEE! Wildlife Qte! This is one of the best posts in ages.

    > I’ve never really seen a wolverine and never knew until now that they’re from the weasel family. Cool!

    > The first pic of the leopard is GORGEOUS. What a regal profile.

    > Tigers = SQUEEEEEE!!! (I have a thing for cats that like water.)

    (Also, love the Tiger Tea comment. Will my teeth get stripey if I drink it?)

    Also, dear readers, pay heed to The Tiger’s infinite Tropical Wisdom: Water is ALWAYS the best way to chill.

    > Grizzlies = cute, but I would never go near one unless there’s a nice fence separating us.

  54. i dont get it????

  55. …lovely, wonderful… & glad to see evidence of Theo’s having a lovely birthday …er…um…
    “Rigga-dam”??
    I don’t even quite know how to form my question, so I’ll use a contemporary phrase:

    “Wha’thu fu'”???
    [Translation: “Huh’?]
    Please advise. Thank you.

  56. momof2kitties says:

    Theo continues to be be made of awsum. And win.

  57. Leslie — that particular reference is older than me. John Wayne. Because it’s ri-goddam-diculous. (which is what came before “redonkulous”, y’know)

  58. I’m surprised the site wasn’t overrrun with UMich alumni cheering their asses off.

  59. @Sccoterpants, I have a friend with an elaborate theory that all the problems in the world are caused by two things: People going to church on Sundays and yelling “Oh God!” when they’re having sex. In both instances, too many times people are bothering God about things that don’t really require His attention, and it makes Him grumpy.

  60. wagthedogma says:

    Could I get two Way of Chill Striped Tiger Teas to go, please? Oh, and with extra lyurps? Thanks! :)

    (Still LMAO over “Look Daddy, they’re wrestling!” :D)

  61. Theresa:Love the theory and heartily concur.

  62. cubbybutt says:

    i like “eyeblink of death!” can i borrow that one?

  63. Fransouah says:

    Wolverine belly button on step 2??

  64. “Let the camera-clutching tourists squeal and flail and gibber. They are tender and delicious.”

    Those two lines would have made me snort coffee out my nose. Good thing I hadn’t yet taken a sip when I read them!

  65. Gorgeous pics! I had no idea wolverines were so cute. I would like to cuddle up with him on the sofa.

  66. MaggieMarvel says:

    Spectacled bears are even lazier. I spent four hours observing one for volunteer hours at the zoo yesterday and it moved, like, once. (It scratched its nose.)

  67. Spectacled bears are extra-cute– small, with sweet looking little faces and silky fur– really should make an appearance on CO– especially since their home is the Andes, and they are thought to be the basis for Paddington Bear (from Darkest Peru).
    http://www.houstonzoo.org/attachments/files/436/SpecBear_pressroom.jpg

  68. @Hon Glad– my stepmother has a corollary additionally blaming high school football coaches in some US communities.

  69. I had no idea what I thought wolverines looked like, but definitely nothing like that. They’re lovely! I love pictures of sleeping kitties. I wish big cats behaved like house cats and we could have them as pets. :o)

  70. momof2kitties says:

    Well, Theresa…since you asked. I am a proud U-M alum…ahem…

    GOBLUE!!!!!!!!!!!

    Thanks. I feel better now. Is it football season yet?

  71. momof2kitties says:

    Oh, and Dippin’ Dots? They be good!! Weird, but good. The Detroit Zoo has ‘em, too.

  72. Speaking of Zoo cuisine, the Bronx Zoo and New York Aquarium have awesome hot dogs and curly fries.

  73. MandaBain says:

    Ew, gravyboat, you have bacon and eggs in your underwear (and then you EAT them)!?

    LOL Teresa…and Theo’s full of win post :-)

  74. “You come from Mongol-flocking Siberia!”

    Ah, who can forget John Wayne as Genghis Kahn: “bath that Tartar wench and then bring her to my tent!”

  75. brilliant as always, theo. “mongol-flocking”, dippin dots, the whole thing…
    jes brillz.

  76. Yitzysmommie says:

    Loverly, just loverly.

  77. I LOVE THIS GD WEBSITE! Case in point

  78. Dexter Fishmore says:

    You must chill! You must chill! I have taken your Firebird keys!

  79. @David– Susan Hayward’s explanation for why the Tatar princess had a mop of red hair: “The Irish got around.”

  80. cliffette says:

    This post reminded me of the little ferret kit on webcam, which is now a big ferret kit on webcam, and happily annoying mum! :)

    http://nationalzoo.si.edu/Animals/NorthAmerica/

  81. cliffette says:

    ^ Oh, and the baby ferret is a boy named Peanut!

  82. @Theresa, awesome :)

    Love the pictures of the leopard, remind me of Edward Gorey’s drawing in The Gashlycrumb Tinies “N is for Neville who died of ennui.”

  83. @Theresa,Let me guess at the football coach theory.”For God’s sake get the Goddam ball and kick the Goddam ball over the Goddam goal for God’s sake, you Goddam, Mother f***ing moron”.”Um,if you would be so kind, by the way, love that blue top, it’s so you!”

  84. @Hon Glad– well, right on the nose for communities in MY area. But in other communities, it’s a hand-holding huddle and just something like “Oh Lord we beseech thee to let us beat the other guys, who are at this moment all holding hands and asking you the same dang thing through Christ our Lord Amen.”

  85. Dexter — nothing bought, sold, or processed, please.

    Hon Glad — American football, I’m thinking. Heh.
    The blue top *is* rather fetching though.

  86. And it’s being worn by what else– a Michigan Wolverine!

    [ahem: MINNESOTA – Ed.]

  87. Splort
    Coffee out my nose.
    “They are tender and delicious.”
    Funniest captioning evah?

  88. Anasztaizia says:

    I was just there last weekend!! Watching one of the bears fish was the highlight of my day — he didn’t quite know how to fish, so he would tummy float, looking for his prey, take a deep breath, and then plunge his BACK FEET down toward the bottom of the pool, as if he were trying to spear the fish with his claws! He did this four HOURS on end (never caught anything though, poor guy) — probably the cutest thing I’ve EVER seen at the zoo.

  89. Eastie – big cats do behave very much like house cats, except they’re bigger so they do more damage when they bite, claw, barf on the windowsills and scratch the furniture.

  90. I made leopard pick #1 my new backround. Never have I wanted to scritch an animal behind the ears so much that would undoubtedly maime me so fast you would need slow-mo to see it. I am even a little nervous when a large dog comes up to me so I can’t explain it. Darwins rules not in effect in my brain.

    [Well, cool, glad you like it! I actually put a fair bit of work into that one, first actually *capturing* Miz Sleepy Leopard with her eyes open, and without using the flash; later I toned down all the weird stray reflections from the glass of the leopard pen… um yeah. It’s all about the leopard, really. But that’s why the cleanup was worth the effort. – Ed.]

  91. Kaitou Juliet says:

    I got a great picture of the tigers when I visited the Minnesota Zoo in June!

    http://s70.photobucket.com/albums/i88/jayoungr/Misc08/?action=view&current=Tigers-062108.jpg

    I got a great shot of the leopard too, standing on its hind legs, looking at something tasty and twitching its tail, just like a housecat seeing a bird or squirrel through a window!

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