At Last the Truth Can Be Told!

My friends, a sinister enemy walks among us — perhaps in your very house.  It comes from the distant reaches of another galaxy, yet takes the form of an innocent house cat, gaining our trust, then … stealing our very thoughts while we sleep!!   My friend, we cannot keep this a secret any longer.  Can your heart stand the shocking facts of … BRAIN ROBBERS FROM OUTER SPACE?!?

That ATM password has GOT to be in here somewhere.

I want to believe, Jill H.

Comments

  1. Now THAT is true love.

  2. YAY X-Files reference, NTMTOM!!!

    (Premiere in 24 hours, 29 minutes w00t!!!!!!!!)

  3. my cat does that -_-

    as well as standing on my sternum…..

  4. claudia says:

    aww YAY… I was just wiping my tears away (very sick relative and I was looking at his hospital pictures~I miss him) and I thought I’d come see some cute.

    THIS is so darned cute, Love it! It’s hugging her head, lol!

  5. Definitely thoughtnapping. Haven’t you ever woken up with a completely empty head?

  6. “you weeeeeel serve me fresh chcicken, you weeeeeel serve me raw fish, you will grant my every command…..now sleeeeep my pretty…. sleeeep….”

  7. Because all you of earth are IDIOTS! You have stupid minds, stupid, stupid!

    (How’s that, NTMTOM?)

  8. Cats stealing breath = old wives’ tale.

    Cats stealing brains = something we really oughta look into.

  9. cheesybird says:

    Alice, I do. All the time. But I don’t have a cat. I think they’re bleaming (not to be confused with bleening) my thoughts straight out of my noggin’ from a distance with their thoughtnapping rays.

  10. “She started as a pimple on my chin!”

  11. And remember, Berthaservant, future events such as these will affect YOU in the future.

  12. cheesybird says:

    Kate: “She started as a pimple on my chin!”

    Bwahahahahahahaha!!!!

  13. That picture makes me want to get a cat more than ever. I want fuzzy brain noms!

  14. Michelle says:

    Cats are just weird. Seriously.

    That photo makes me smile and gives me the jeebers at the same time.

  15. Meg, I love you just as much as I love Criswell, which is a lot. ^.^

  16. Loosely Twisted says:

    This is freaky…. I think I know both of them in the pic, and I am like WHOA>>>> NO WAY DUDE!!!!!!!!

    ***walks slowly away from the puter***

  17. My cat does this too, except she wraps herself around my head and noms my brains with her belly.

  18. Hon Glad says:

    Well, I feel quite safe.My one remaining brain cell,
    is safe in a biscuit tin, (Murican cookie jar) in the cupboard under the stairs. NO ONE gets out alive from the cupboard under the stairs. I don’t dare enter and though the gas and electric meters are there, the meter men, will only stand just in the doorway and they have to use a TORCH, for gawds sake!

  19. I used to housesit for a guy friend who had an AWESOME cat, and she knew I was allergic (I explained it to her very carefully when we first met, and she was very understanding). She was allowed sleep at the foot of the bed, but not under my chin (her favored spot); it took only one discussion for her to comply (did I mention she was an AWESOME cat?).

    Then one morning (two days into a three-week housesitting gig) I woke up, SNEEZING to beat the band, and kinda overheated, besides, wondering what the hell was going on.

    Turned out the cat had figured out that she could nestle on the pillow RIGHT ON TOP OF MY HEAD, thereby absorbing the maximum heat from my person, while at the same time NOT being in my line of vision. Win/win, right?

    If she hadn’t woken up and started purring as soon as my sneezing started, I might never have caught on.

    Moral of the story (for anyone who doesn’t have them or hasn’t spent a week with one who likes you): Cats LOVE the top of your head– ain’t no warmer spot in the house.

  20. Gail (the first one) says:

    One of my foster kittehs in Philly was a head-sleeper….At least, that’s what I *thought* he was doing!!! Now that I know he was stealing my thoughts, no wonder he seemed so disturbed, LOL!!

  21. momof2kitties says:

    Oh man! That is so cute! My cats won’t even sleep in my bed with me. Where is the love?

    *pouts*

  22. Love the hovertext!!

    This is one of those posts that make me wish I weren’t allergic to kitties!!!! I think this looks quite comfortable.

  23. snort! that is so cute!!!
    pretty kitty.

  24. The ATM password is BOSCO. (and he killed my mother!)

  25. Too cute!

  26. i looooove calicos! they are especially prone to head naps and brain nomming.

    occasionally my Yoshimi (aka shimi, sheemster, meme, memeerson, etc.) will throw in a mini head massage/acupuncture just for good measure too. ;o)

  27. Oh, my, yes. I had one a them brain-suckin’ cats for many years. Her second-favorite sleepin’ spot was draped across my windpipe. Whoever started that legend about cats stealin’ babies’ breath must’ve had a cat like my Ludmilla.

  28. My Magrat does the same thing to me … When she does, we call it her “cat hat” position, or, if we’re feeling bilingual, the “chat-peau” :D

  29. Natalie says:

    I have two cats that actually compete for the head space, although not so much now it’s summer. In winter it’s a free for all. We have 4 altogether and the other 2 are competing for the foot space. Weirdos.
    CUTE picture.

  30. yankeebird says:

    LOL, one of my girls does this on occasion. Unfortunately there’s never been witnesses to the madness.

  31. snoopysnake says:

    This cat knows all, tells none! She has already been to visit YOU while you slept. She knows all your secrets!

  32. Oh, wow! Someone suggested on another site that most cats aren’t attached to their people….this certainly gives the lie to that! (I replied that you have to encourage them/make the first overtures or they can get on by themselves…if you give them attention, they can be the most loving of animals.)

  33. BTW, J Bo….pet stores now have stuff for people who are allergic to kitties. I think it reduces allergens on the cat.

  34. that’s a very pretty cat

  35. I had a kitty who did this. I wouldn’t have minded if he just slept, but he’d start out by kneading on my skull, which didn’t feel so great. He was the most loving kitty ever. I miss him. :(

  36. MandaBain says:

    I now know what you did last summer…

  37. Now really, people, THINK. What in the world would a cat want with a human’s silly thoughts? She’s not STEALING thoughts, she’s INSERTING them: “Get up and feed the cat NOW. Get up and feed the cat NOW. Get up and feed the cat NOW. . . . “

  38. chanpon says:

    BOSCO!

    I would love a little kitty head warmer for those cold winter nights.

  39. willowfae says:

    This reminds me of my cat before I gave in and gave him his own pillow right above mine. Now he sleeps on his pillow above my head and only his paws and tail dangle onto my face.

  40. Theresa says:

    My Stinky cat did this exact thing to me. He stole my free will and made me his minion. In one night I went from “!@#! kitten gotta find you a home” to “MUST. BRING. TUNA.”

  41. Good point, Juno!

  42. Heather says:

    Love the hovertext!

  43. ahhhh … NOW I understand why I’m going bald! My cat is to blame.

  44. scooterpants says:

    i’m glad my Steve doesnt do this.
    the drooling would be…
    a ‘skotch’ irritating.

  45. (the original) Mel says:

    Reason #485 not to like cats: They steal brainwaves.

  46. tracyFlick says:

    Why do cats do this? Weirdos.

  47. Anne Boleyn says:

    Hey NTHTOM, that text makes me think John McCain was here what with calling us “my friend, as JMcC does so annoyingly often. BTW, I am not his friend so I wish he’d stop calling me that. I AM, hopefully NTMTOM’s friend though.

  48. Virginia says:

    I have those exact same pillow cases! What a cowinkidink!

  49. SoCalSis says:

    The cat’s body is so relaxed and his eyes are so evil– like he’s reaching into a sack and pawing around in there: “OK, Let’s see what we got here… High School locker combination… Great-Aunt’s birthdate… old Perry Mason episode — gee that Della Street is some dish!– Where IS the dang ATM password??”

  50. awwwww I love how kittehs must use the brainular area as a personal pillow.

    what’s this?
    a martian brain sucker!
    what’s it doing?
    starving!!! haha

  51. DennisMM says:

    That’s not really a calico cat. It’s the photographer’s chiropracter.

  52. cubbybutt says:

    My parents had those same pillowcases when I was a kid!

  53. Our tabby used to do this to my dad in the early morning, but that was his way of pushing dad to get up so he could have the nice warm concave pillow all to himself…RIP Hobbes…

  54. zeldapie says:

    This explains why I’m becoming so forgetful. thanks a lot, Zelda (my tabby baby).

    Whenever I house- and cat-sat for my parents, their huge, wonderful cat Daisy (rest in peace, sweetheart) used to lie on my chest as I slept. I can’t tell you how many times I had nightmares that I was suffocating, only to wake up with a fat fluffball calico crushing my chest, staring at me from 1 inch away. God, I miss her.

  55. Actually what that cat is doing is implanting thoughts of canned catfood into her hooman’s brain. I knew they did this but I’ve never seen documentation of an actual thought transfer in process.

    I often find that I’ll be minding my own business, perhaps sitting at my desk looking at my computer, when suddenly thoughts of canned catfood will leap to the forefront of my mind. Sometimes it’ll actually take the form of an image of a can, accompanied by the urgent thought, “I have to feed the cat right away!” I’ll look over and see my cat sitting there on the floor staring at me intently. You do the math.

    The other amazing thing about my cat is, she is actually learning to say the word “can.” No, really! For some reason everyone else thinks it just sounds like she’s saying “meow” but I swear she’s saying “can!” My boyfriend hears it too…we’re so impressed with our kitty, she’s super smart and a linguist too!

  56. Makes me miss my kitteh… he used to sleep curled around my head.

  57. goodlookingelf says:

    Love the X-files reference. Hey, fans, there is a marathon on Sci-Fi Channel today! Yes, all cats do this, how do you think they so effortlessly take over the house and make it their little kingdom? Muuussst get me food, musssst get me tons of toyyyyssss, must clean out my box as soon as I usssssseeee eeeettt!

  58. Much as I love my dogs, if ever there were an animal who could take over the world, it would be cats.

    Notice that this particular kitty looks kind of bored, like, “Are those really your thoughts? Is that all there is? Sheesh.”

  59. CoffeeCup says:

    I think the cat’s probably like, “You really need to stop watching ‘Dancing with the Stars’ already…”

  60. “I Luvs My Hoomann!”

  61. NTMTOM, I love that we’re still the only two to be playing on the P9FOS level. X-files, peh.

  62. woofysma says:

    One night, as we lay in the dark, my husband whispered, “I have a new hat.” Upon inspection, I saw our large blond sheepdog mix draped over his head. Woofy assumed that she was welcome anywhere and that the bed was hers, the house was hers, and we were her staff. Miss my big bear so much – sniff.

  63. Mitsu- My vet told me that while people think in words, animals think in pictures. So your cat probably is communicating to you with the image of the can that she wants food. You should be happy you’re able to pick up her messages!

  64. Mitsu – my cat also imitates my speech and says “up” which he elongated and which became “Geronimo” – he says that when he jumps on counter, either “uuuuhh” or something more complicated, always the same, but hard to transcribe, for Geronimo.

    I think he’s working on a word for “eat.” Sort of an “eeed”

  65. Mitsu – animals think in pictures and will sometimes send them to you. Gerbils communicate with each other in pictures, and have given me the notion of “greens.” I almost take picture-swapping with my one cat for granted now…he also send me pictures of food if I don’t give him and his brother food on a timely basis. If I lay down near feeding time, I get the picture, plus the notion to get up urgently.

    I have read a suggestion on a cat magazine website to try to exchange mental pictures with your cat.

    Once I asked him where his brother was, and he led me right to him.

    We also have a deal where he gets treats after I clip his claws. Once he wiggled and squirmed and I couldnt clip but one claw, and then he ran to the kitchen and looked at me. “No you aren’t getting treats,” I said, “I haven’t done your claws yet!” He thought a moment, got back on the sofa, and stretched his feet out so I could do his claws….and give him his treats!

  66. Gailann says:

    my cat does this. Kind of “hugs” my head with his chin. Pushes down and then purrs like he’s trying to be comforting like a human (which he is in a furry body).

    Odd feeling but comforting…

  67. Paunchie says:

    Jajeh, they have this new thing for clipping toe nails on critters called “peticure” apparently it doesn’t bother them at all.

  68. One cat loves to wrap herself around my head on the pillow, while the other sits on my chest. I thought they were protecting my brain and my soul while I slept, but clearly I was wrong… they’re stealing it!

  69. I have spoken to an animal communicator, and that’s what she said as well – animals communicate in pictures. It really does work when you silently comminicate with them that way.

  70. Paunchie says:

    that’s what I have read too, about the picture-thinking.

    I wish the cats could tell me what they are looking at when they are staring at something invisible to me!

  71. Goodlookingelf – now I know how to spend my day waiting for midnight! I made myself a t-shirt last night, and am crocheting a teeny Mulder and Scully to bring with me. (Look up Cute Creepy Crochet on Amazon for a general idea of their obscene adorableness.)

  72. Lizzy — it’s funny, but you know what I missed most from that series? The opening titles & theme music. The show “Medium” provides a pretty good substitute for those, btw (besides being pretty good TV suspense fiction in general).

  73. Jiffknee says:

    Makes me miss my Molly-girl. Not only did she love to wrap her whole body ’round the top of my head, but if I dared to sleep in on the weekends, delaying the morning feeding, I would feel my hair/head being petted with increasing pressure until I finally would relent.

    That scene looks so peaceful and nap-inducing, think I’m gonna pop right into bed next to them. Think they’d share a corner of the blankie?

  74. BeanSidhe says:

    And then there are the kitties that can suck out your brain from across the room. The first time I managed to fish Boo out from under our the bed when my sister-in-law was over, all the poor girl could do upon seeing her was gibber and drool.
    Boo looked very smug after that…

  75. Don’t I WISH I could get my calico this close at bedtime.

  76. Nothing and nobody can love you like a cat can…

    Possibly kitty is soothing a headache by purring on the head… purring is very therapeutic.
    What a lovely and sweet little cat.

  77. milhouse says:

    oh thank god you got rid of that horrible, misogynistic tattoo. i was just coming to leave an offended comment.

  78. Tina Rhea says:

    I bet that lady is dreaming about motorcycles (because of the purring on her head).

  79. I think it’s the orange ones that are brain suckers. I’ve had an orange female brainsucker, and a male orange breath- and brain- sucker.

    And of course, torties and calicos are part orange.

    The other part of torties and calicos is completely inexplicable and unique, quirky, and occasionally wicked.

  80. Theo is an X-Phile? *swoon* Between that, the premiere tonight, and me getting to pet a 4-month old SUPER FLOOFY babeh Pomeranian today, this may be the best day of my life.

  81. … Plus my own center-of-my-world puppeh went to the groomer yesterday, and she feels like a cloud. :)

  82. Paunchie -
    Just saw the Peticure advertised ontv and might look into it.
    When you wonder what they are looking at, try asking them with your mind…Make a picture of the direction they are looking and think a sort of questionmark on it. Empty your head of thoughts and see if a picture comes to you
    Worth a try.

  83. Loved your comment, Cat Allergy Symptoms, about how much cats love you.

    When my cat kneads and kneads, purring away….and he’s doing that just because he WANTS to…or when one of them sleeps pressed against my legs, where he might go flying across the room if I roll over…when they follow me from room to roomjust to be with me…they make me feel so loved!

  84. Gail (the first one) says:

    @Jajeh: So very true!!! Thanks for reminding me….sometimes I forget how wonderful it is!!!!

  85. what does it mean when your cat chews your hair until it’s sopping wet?

  86. PNY — it means “PLEH!”

  87. catvicc4r says:

    One of my baybehs does this every night, crawls on the pillow, shoves his nose behind my ear, grabs a piece of hair in his mouf, and sucks/drools while making big biscuits on my head. He’s done this 2-3x/night for the past 4 years. Wake up with earful of cat drool.

    It’s just our thing. My husband is totally grossed out by it. Oh well…

  88. DixiesMom says:

    My Dixie wants to sleep not on my head, but under my arm, under the covers… and if I’m not snappy enough lifting them up for her to crawl under, she STICKS HER PAW UP MY NOSE to wake me up. I learned reeaaal fast to keep those claws trimmed…

  89. binky-mama says:

    “Brain Robbers from Outer Space”? Did anyone else watch and love Mystery Science Theater 3000? Sounds like a movie they would watch and rip to shreds. *sniff* I miss that show!

    Kitteh is all: “MY hoomin! You cannot haz!”

  90. Awwww, I want a head-hugging kitty!

  91. Gail (the first one) says:

    @binky-mama: I so LOVED MST3K, too!!! I miss it too!! I bought DVD copies of a couple of seasons’ worth of shows off eBay. Oh, and there’s some up on YouTube:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OGqpVzRgQfo

  92. binky-mama says:

    @Gail: Weren’t they great? What’s not to love about horrible cheesy movies mixed with sarcasm, witty jabs, and general silliness?

  93. Binky-Mama — I am a total MSTie, still have about 50 full VHS tapes of the original comedy central version.

    Since no one seems to have gotten it, NTMTOM is actually playing off of the opening of the film “Plan Nine From Outer Space” (originally called “Grave Robbers from Outer Space”) directed by Ed Wood. It was never done on MST3K (though there were many like it), but it widely regarded as one of the “worst” films ever made. If you haven’t seen the film “Ed Wood” then see it! (The actualy P9FOS is also worth a look if you are really in the mood for a laugh).

    But yeah, I miss Tom Servo and Crow. A lot! But the guys from MST3K now have a NEW enterprise — check out http://www.rifftrax.com, downloadable “commentary” for all kinds of movies!

  94. In fact — TOTAL COINCIDENCE — the Rifftrax crew, including Mike Nelson (Mike), Kevin Murphy (Tom Servo) and Bill Corbett (Gypsy) will be in San Diego this Sunday — doing commentary for Plan Nine From Outer Space!!! LOL.

  95. Hon Glad says:

    Cats think in pictures uh? Then I musta been a cat in a past life cos so do I. I have always said I have a visual memory.
    As for Cat telepathy; I was sitting in the garden last night having A silent weep over something, when Stan my one and a half year old Tux comes over, purrs me, lets me breathe through his coat,and dry my tears on him; then it’s, my work is done and he sods off.

  96. One of my cats has a similar move, but he approachs the side of my head. I usually end up with a face full of cat-belly and can’t breathe, lol.

  97. ThreeCatNight says:

    What a sweetie; so cute!
    Why not a stolen brain; my three have already stolen my heart!

  98. Yes I have one of these cats myself. At least now I can give a credible explanation for my behavior.

  99. Hey! This could be a whole new category!
    ‘Cats AS hats’

  100. Well I just want to give the both of them a big ole hug!

  101. SammysMom says:

    I was diagnosed with sleep apnea several years ago and must wear a mask on my face in order to keep breathing at night. There is a port on the front of the mask at about nose level which constantly blows out air. Apparantly my 14 year old tortie did not like this. After about a week of having this new nuisance in her life, she decided the best solution was to simply lay across my head with her belly covering my face and the offending exhause port! Problem solved. It was like that alien movie when that alien thing hatches from the egg and attaches to the persons face. She would happily sleep there all night.

  102. Emmerly says:

    PLAN 9 REFERENCE OMG YES

    Whoa. WHOA.

    AND an X-Files reference???

    I am ded.

  103. MY then three year old nephew, every time he saw me and multiple times at that, remembered when I told him the story of my blonde Persian, Farah. “kitty sleep on ooo neck?”
    MY husband is allergic, so I have my memories. I want a giraffe- but not to sleep on ooo neck”.

  104. Whatever reason it be gone, thank you for nixing that horrid tatoo. And he will live with that horror for the rest of his life. He is NOT coming to any of my birthday parties.

  105. fleabit says:

    I think it’s more like tought transferrance (is that a word?) Kitteh is going: ‘tuna, tuna, tuna – must . . . get . . . up . . . open can . . .’

  106. Thank you everyone for your interesting comments…while the part about her learning to say “can” is more of a joke, this particular cat really is amazing with her communication abilities. She is extraordinarily good at understanding what I’m trying to tell her – for example, the very first time she got up on the counter and I told her to “get down” and pointed at the floor, she immediately did it without any hesitation. She has understood that phrase every time since, although she occasionally puts her ears back and pretends she didn’t hear me, it’s too late for her to pretend she doesn’t know what I mean! She also gets special treats with glucosamine in them, and when I want to give some to her in the other room (so my other cat doesn’t gobble them all), all I have to do is catch her eye and show her, and she’ll just sort of casually get up and saunter into the other room like nothing’s really happening, so I can give her her treat. Clever cat.

    I’m pretty interested in inter-species communication, and after careful observation I’ve concluded that our furry friends are a lot smarter than we are told they are. There is an interesting article in animal communication/intelligence in the March 2008 National Geographic you all might want to check out – science is finally catching on that animals are intelligent, and they are communicating with us!

  107. darkshines says:

    I’m gonna eat your brains, and gain you knowledge….

  108. sightless in gaza says:

    Not your brains, they’re after your eyes! Ancestral memories of eyes being the tastiest part of fish, and experience of the saltiness of tears make them think: – If I just get the right moment, just after they’ve opened their eyes and just before they’re fully awake, I’ll have at least one of those away!! 17 years of living with 3 cats convinces me of this!

  109. The other day I was moving things out of one cupboard and into another, and putting something else in the first cupboard. When I got back to cupboard A with the stuff I wanted to put in, Ben was in it. I laughed and said, “Funny kitty! Would you mind getting out?” with no special emphasis or gesture, and he jumped right out!

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