I recommend, er, ‘Hospital corners’

There are a few, uh ways to uh, make the, uh, perfect bed. [Cliff Claven voice]First, simply check the thread count.

To do an accurate reading, you must tuck sheets in, hospital corners-like, then, crawl in.


Push against the, uh sheets to check density of thread count, to assure a comfer-tuh-bul sleeping surface, there. 3500 to 4500 thread count is uh, preferable, there.


Add at least fifteen er twenty pillows, some quilts, a down comforter or two, and an electric blankie to make certain yer fort—er bed stays warm.


That should, pretty much do it there. Now, order some Pounce treats. If all else fails, go get them yourself.


Alison M. R.? Is it me, or is there a cold snap across the country!?



  1. Hahaa! My cat Trixie does that all the time.

  2. But those lumpy beds are the BEST.

  3. The second photo looks like someone sat on the bed not knowing kitty was in there. Yikes! But I love cats under the covs.

  4. In strict observation of the protocol related to “firstness,” subsection 2 paragraph 5, I hereby claim…..


  5. Beauregard says:

    LOL! I love the smooshed ears in pic two.

  6. My cat does this all the time, too. He’ll run up the stairs when he sees me with the sheets. As soon as I take him off the bed he jumps right back on. We repeat the process until I get the fitted sheet on. I then make him into the bed and see how long he hangs out.

  7. Those look like bunny ears in the second pict. Maybe I should try that…

  8. For the love of jauntiness says:

    Awww! As snug as a bug in a rug, even though he’s a cat (not a bug), and he’s on a bed rather than a rug, but still…

  9. *feelin the snuggly warmth*

    Check these two dogs:

  10. Nice nose stripe there, Inspector C. But… where the heck can one buy sheets with threadcounts that high? I mean, luxury cotton weave is like 300!

    Cats. [rolleyes]

  11. Bah… the link didn’t work but it’s on the side where it says “Gus and Chase”

  12. Jaypo, yes, I think that might be a lop-eared bunny in the second pic. How bizarre? Otherwise, nice kittitude.

  13. Cliff Claven voice? Who the fluff is Cliff Claven?

  14. i’m in ur bed, getting fur all over ur cleen sheets!

  15. Heh-heh, my kitteh does this all the time. ‘Cept I don’t completely make the bed with her in it, ’cause I’m afraid she’d suffocate, God Forbid! But we do have a lot of fun playing “kill the sheets” and related games, lol. 🙂

  16. Caption correction: those are catacorner sheets, I think. Sometimes called kittycorner. My Sara helps rid my bed of the horrible bedmice, or that’s her story when she does this. Great pictures, too.

  17. LOL! I just hope kitty gets out before someone accidentally sits on the bed!

    Unci – Cliff Claven is that mailman dude from “Cheers”.

  18. I don’t know about the rest of the country, but in Tulsa we’ll have a HIGH of 20 today. I have 4 out of 5 cats on the bed and the other sitting out in the snow watching for squirrels… and playing with the husky. He’ll come in shortly to warm his cold paws on my warm tummy. It’s been years since we’ve had this much snow.

  19. My kitties love to do this! I put on the fitted sheet, and then they creep about under it, all flattened out. Very funny to watch. Nellie will stay in there for up to half an hour, purring away.

  20. Making the bed was always playtime for our kitties.

  21. Rumi–My cats do the same thing.
    They love to “help” make the bed all the time, but instead of “kill the sheets”, they chase the wrinkles and try to beat them out with their paws.

    (at least that’s their story)

    And what a beautiful helper-kitty too. Such lovely markings!

  22. I love it. That could be my little Dorrie-doddle. It used to be a game I would play with Mimi, a black persian. Then she taught it to Dorrie. Even with the sheets and comforter in the middle of summer, they still loved it.

  23. my cat does this even after the bed is already made. my husband plopped down on the other day, but it hasn’t stopped her from tunneling; she’s even teaching the kitten how to burrow..

  24. Awwww – what a precious fuzzy butt having fun chillin in the clean sheets!!!! Totally makes me wanna snorgle him – even though its not a super fuzzy kitten…

  25. Yeps, we have a kitty that is frequently made into teh bed. Nala-kitty cannot be bothered to move from her nap-spot some days.

  26. Yes, there is a cold snap, which is why my feet are cold and my cats are all sleeping on my bed. On my pillows.

  27. My babies do that. I finally have to go in and drag them out while I’m making the bed. They especially love playing peekaboo like that.

  28. BED KITTYYYYY!! *pounce!*


  29. Peg of Tilling says:

    Higher thread count = less cat hair retention [end Martha Stewart moment]

  30. MamaDawn, I’m gald to know you have 5 kitties. I just adopted kitty #4 this weekend from a shelter. She was considered too wild to be adopted, but my other 3 cats were all feral, too. Anyhoo, I was afraid I might have crossed the line into “Crazy Cat Lady” domain. Now I’m happy, once I get kitty #4 socialized, I can rescue another!

  31. Growing up we had a kitty who would sneak onto the waterbed when the sheets were off so she could chase the air bubbles. She would chase them right into the corners, where I’m sure she must have caught several, because that’s where all the leaks were.

  32. Connie-
    Congrats on the kitty!
    Our number 4 was a feral rescue too, and he’s now just a cuddlemuffin.
    Your other cats will show him that you’re part of the pack — but it just takes a lot of patience.

  33. When my kitty does this she never comes out willingly.
    Mostly I just make the bed about half-way and come back, because she’s just so content under there.
    Oh, and she claims she is getting the bed shark — the one that comes out at bed time at the foot of the bed and is enthusiastically killed all night.

  34. little gator says:

    Except for the white blaze, that cat looks just like my tock-toaster the Empress Lydia from the dec 3 2006 entry.

  35. Yup, this must be a universal kitty “thing”, ’cause my cats love this too. The sheets cannot be changed without a little game of hiding under the sheets and attacking anything up top that wiggles…like fingers.

  36. Yep, even little (not so little?) TK did this with us last night as we put on the new fuzzy flannel sheets. We just call it “cat lump”. He tunneled most enthusiastically all the way across — and it’s a king-sized bed!

    HRTortie, of course, claimed the foot of the bed for the night, complete with more than her share of electric blanket.

  37. Is it just me or does anyone else feel a remake of Jaws coming on?

    Duh nuh! DUH nuh! Duhnuhnuhnuhnuhnuhnuhnuh nuhnuhnuhunuh NUH!

    And so on and so forth.

  38. When I was a kid – too many years ago to say – I had a beagle puppy who did this. She’d come into bed with me really early in the morning, then go all the way down to the bottom to keep my feet warm. I’d get up and go to school and she’d stay there. Many times my mom went to make the bed, only to find Shelby still in there.

  39. Nicolletta says:

    What? I’m just keeping the bed warm for you! *g*

  40. My favorite part of the “kill the sheets” game is when my cat runs around in a circle trying to kill all the wrinkles that pop up because of her running around in circles.

  41. Heh-heh. As part of “kill the sheets:”, my kitteh Summer loves it when she’s standing on the sheet and I pull it (swiftly but gently) — suddenly she’s sheet-surfing!

    Yeah, I buy sheets a lot because all my sheets end up full of claw-holes, lol. But my cat is happy, and that’s what’s important!

  42. Connie, I don’t know what “Crazy Cat Lady” number is, but we had 7 at one time.

    Two cats, seven cats…..meh, they just aren’t much trouble at all! 🙂

  43. One of my kittens does this ALL the time. Even if the bed is made, she’ll crawl up the side of the bed, under the sheets. Then my other kitten, who loves attacking anything under the sheets (such as my toes), will go and attack her. Hours or entertainment!

    If I ever see a lump on the bed, I always feel it before I plop down.

  44. 7 cats? Feh. I had 13 cats growing up (one of them was brought home on the schoolbus by a “friend” of my brother’s, who foisted her off on said brother when he realized his mom would keeeeel him–oh, and she was pregnant). I’ve only got two now, but I know the Crazy Cat Lady thing is my inexorable destiny. I’m quite looking forward to it, actually.

  45. In case anyone needed the word “YEEP” explained to them…

  46. Brak_Silverbone says:

    What a beautifully-marked and clever kitty! And lucky, too.

  47. I’ve been the crazy cat lady in my family for years… the high was 6 cats, 2 big dogs and 2 teenagers (and one husband going through 2nd childhood — I HATE motorcycles). We have a pretty good pack right now. They all love to sit on the desk and check out CO.

  48. OMG I love it! The cat my mom had when I was growing up would do this; we called her the cancer bump when she hid under the sheets.

  49. Last pic:” Yeah I own this bed, you got a problem with that!”

  50. “This cat may not be removed under penalty of paw except by the consumer.”

    “This is Tunnel Cat to Pillow Base. I’ve been cornered! Cover me! Over.”
    “Pillow Base to Tunnel Cat. It’s a sham. Commence Operation Human Sleep Depurrivation.”

  51. Pyrit said:

    “This cat may not be removed under penalty of paw except by the consumer.”


  52. It’s that blankety-blanket cat.

  53. We call this “lump” as in “where’s the cat?” – “oh, she’s lump”

  54. joining the party late here, but had to comment on the crazy cat lady issue –
    I’m at ten. And two guinea pigs!
    And they’re all happy, healthy, and know they’re loved!