OMG!!1 DOG KRONSCHE-ATTACKS BABY!!!

OMG!!! HELP!!!

HELP, I Say!

This kids’ toes are GONERS, PEOPLE!!!

Soft_kroonononcshe

Oh—never mind—it’s just a textbook Soft Kronsche, People. Move along.

You too, Karen P.

 

Comments

  1. I know we usually coo about animals, but I have to say I love the soft, fuzzy baby head. I bet it smells great :)

  2. “The new baby sitter has some very interesting techniques”

  3. ShelleyTambo says:

    Well. That made me laugh out loud–especially the doggy tail sticking straight up.

  4. OMG babies and puppies!

    and its a chocolate lab pup, the cutest of the cute!

  5. TheLoveofIsis says:

    That baby has just about as much hair on the head as the dog does, lol! Dastardly cute! Toe nibbler!

  6. I suspect SLURPAGE here. Heh.

  7. How cute is it that both pups are laying about in the exact same pose?

  8. A baby? With a dog?

    (takes a seat, with a box of raisinettes, holds onto ticket stub – there might be an intermission – and waits)

  9. ShelleyTambo says:

    Aubrey–got any Milk Duds?

  10. MaggieBelle says:

    One can hope there won’t be much trollage since the dog is biting the baby and not the other way around. Seems like people get their panties in a bunch when a baby is doing something supposedly heinous to the animal, however, baby mauling is not only preferred, but encouraged.

    This is totally cute, though. Love dogs and babies.

  11. Aubrey, I got the BIG box of Junior Mints!

    If you run out of Raisinettes, you can share my mints.

  12. MaggieBelle says:

    Who’s gonna turn down a Junior Mint? It’s chocolate, it’s peppermint, it’s delicious!

  13. MaggieBelle, do you not recall the OMG-BABY-MAULED-BY-BIG-DOG-NOT-CUTE controversy?

  14. Allie and Jojo-s Mom says:

    Hey – someone pass the popcorn and the Super Jumbo Mega Extra-Large Soda (c)

  15. That just makes me laugh! Both the baby and the puppy are cute. Labs are the best dogs in the world!

  16. Awww! How cute! I bet when the baby scoots the pup scoots to keep up with him.

  17. i’m with the baby, thats some nice tile. *inspects*

  18. MaggieBelle says:

    You’re right, Jen. I did forget about that.

    I’m just remembering the “Baby bites the kitten’s tail” commentroversy and all the baby-haters that crawled out of the woodwork.

    I stand corrected :)

  19. Even the pup knows that baby toes are delicious and nutritious.

  20. NebraskaErin says:

    My mom’s pup does this when she wants you to play with her.

    Baby looks unconcerned. Probably giggling over the tickly sensation when the pup licks his toes.

  21. Choco-lab puppy! Fuzzy-headed baby! Toe chompage! Cutest picture yet!

  22. It takes a lot to make this cynical girl LOL, but this pic does it. MaggieBelle – Is that a Kramerism about the Junior Mint? I totally agree.

  23. martha in mobile says:

    Being an overprotective mother, I am worried about that beautiful baby head meeting that beautiful hard tile. Kronsche, indeed.

    And does anyone else think (eyes narrowing) that Meg may just be baiting certain readers with these racks N kronsches?

  24. Adorable!!!!!!!!!

  25. Call DFACS on me but it’s nice to see an animal bite back for a change on this page.

  26. “Omigod caught her just in time–she was heading for the street!”

    Good dog.

  27. blueberries4me says:

    I love dogs that do Froggy legs! And look at that tail!

  28. Guys…

    Thanks for the offers and stuff, but as the comments seem level, happy and fuzzy, it seems that I can’t sit back with all the treats.

    So I finished them all. (burp)

  29. yoohoostereo says:

    EliottM…

    I was thinking the same thing. The puppy was pulling baby back from doing something naughty.

  30. Wow…gorgeous tile floor. :)

  31. Aubrey — it’s early yet. Patience.
    [trots off to dig out the air-popper & the jar of Snorgle Redenboinger]

  32. musicchick2 says:

    Aubrey – I’m so disappointed in you :-l

  33. Why is that baby kicking the puppy in the mouth? ;-)

  34. OMG,is Meg trying to make the Nuffers’ brains asplode from craziness? Shite.

    [backing away slowly, not wanting to end up as an innocent bystander quality]

    (For non-freaking-out-nuffers: do you remember how awesome fun and tickly it was when a dog leecked/nibbled your toes?)

  35. I am cracking up because I KNOW that baby is giggling all bubblyjubbly and laughing so hard the drool is down it’s chin and THAT is the baby’s fascination with the tile because it’s trying to play with the little drool pool while goofy Lab buddy puts mojo on the toe-toes. Ticklin’ and gigglin’ and droolin’.

  36. Oh, and what you can’t see, ’cause it’s outside the frame. There was a kitteh, whose tail the baby was kroshing, only it escaped before the pic was snapped.

  37. Audrey, be patient. I suspect everyone’s still in a tizzy posting over the latest victem up on the “rack”.

  38. martha in mobile, I also saw these two posts today and thought: “Mischievous Meg!”

    (Which was also the title of a children’s book I enjoyed and read over and over when I was a kid.)

  39. Sorry, MC2 – but there were M&M’s involved, and those cannot I resist.

    Offers of comestibles can be catapulted in the direction of Los Angeles.

    By the way, this photo simply drips innocence and happiness. Any critique would be…infantile. Kronche on!

  40. Yeah. It’s probably a JELLY baby.
    (har)

  41. pyrit – “giggling all bubblyjubbly” … love your descriptions!
    love the pic!

  42. To me it seems like some bizarre ‘fish out of water’ tableau. It’s as if they are swimming – but not.

    Or maybe my morning’s half n’ half was a little too far past the expiration date. Dooooood…

  43. tis’ cute…

  44. minnesnowtah says:

    Beeeeg shluuur-pee kee-ronsche.
    I love that upright tail!

    Patience, Aubrey, those nuffs have busy schedules. So many websites to nuff on, so little time!

    *ahem* (clears throat) Let the games — er, the commentroversy — begin! ;)

  45. [loading puddingpult with butterscotch]
    Miracle Mile, look out!

  46. 1. Dogs <3 food and poop.

    2. At any given moment babies either have food or poop on them.

    3. The baby needs to have the food or poop cleaned off, and the dog needs to…well, you can see where this is heading. Let’s just say it makes for the perfect symbiotic relationship, and leave it at that.

  47. “Invisible pool!”

  48. Y’know, I know a lot of humans who like to nibble on baby toes. It’s nice to see that humans aren’t the only ones.

  49. Deckard Canine says:

    It’s a chocolate lab, yet it seems to be the one doing the munching.

  50. I ran away from the cats’n’racks commentroversy (too much stress in my life today to deal with it on my favorite escape site) and started reading these comments with one eye closed (like when you watch a movie that’s about to get really scary and you are afraid to watch but can’t completely stop?). I’m so happy that it’s all good so far! And I completely agree that Meg is subtly taunting today as well – naughty, naughty! But funny.
    Anyone have any kettle corn to share?

  51. I have jordan almonds if you all run out of treats while waiting….

  52. Could a chocolate lab be annexed to the CO Dream Office?

  53. Hey, man, this is not cool! I don’t come here to see pictures of babies! (:Þ)

  54. It’s true, Pocky– as I said, “delicious AND nutritious!”

  55. minnesnowtah says:

    A chocolate lab-oratory in the CO Dream Office, I would love that.
    Could I have some chocolate puddin’, guys?

  56. PUDDINS!!

  57. it looks like simon says — the pups in the same position as the baby!

  58. Dangit! My work internet filter has blocked the comments for the Racks entry… eh, probably for the best. :)

    I love the dog’s pose in this one. My dog can’t do frog legs so I always love it when other dogs can.

  59. OK, “Snorgle Redenboinger” is TOTALLY going to be my new screen name next time I join a message board.

    I, too, am a mother (of a 7 month old) so my first thought too was “OMG, poor babee’s gonna bonk his head on the tile!” Aaaaaand then I saw the delectable kronche-ness going on. Bleepin’ anerable, that.

  60. AuntieMame says:

    I’m staying out of the current rack controversy. I’m having a crappy day and I don’t want to hear it. (Especially since I’m kinda leaning towards Nuffery on this one…)

    Howsomever…the babeh and puppeh are lovely. I agree with whoever said there ought to be a kitteh in the babe’s mouth, and I can’t help but wonder what’s nibbling on the pup’s paw just out of camera range on the top right. A moose, or something, no doubt…

  61. I love the look of studied concentration on the dog’s face. He’s trying to get just the right amount of kronshe on that foot.

  62. MØØSES!!!

  63. Gah, not fast enough…

  64. (stirs cauldron)

    “Double boiler
    Toil and trouble
    Fire don’t burn
    Nor puddin’ bubble”

  65. That was brilliant, Decker Canine.

  66. This reminds me of a yellow lab I once knew, Floyd. Floyd was a master of the soft kronsche AND a total “ass-man,” as it turned out. Whenever anyone with a particularly juicy set of ‘tocks (such as myself…not to brag) wandered onto Floyd’s radar, he’d spring into action…slowly and quietly pad up behind them..streeeech out his neck…and firmly, but ever so tenderly, cup & kronsche the target butt-cheek. He’d usually give it at least two really good squeezes before he’d let go.

    Lemme tell you, when you’re standing there minding your own business and suddenly your jelly gets hoovered into a big, wet mouth and squeezed between a full set of Laborador teeth you freeze all movement pretty quick.

    Still, I can appreciate a dog who can appreciate a girl with a little junk in the trunk.

  67. Awwwww… nibblin’ zee toesies..

  68. ShelleyTambo says:

    astrid jane–second time this pic/thread has made me laugh out loud.

    On my way to lunch today I was lucky enough to see a woman standing in the open door of her station wagon cheerleading her dog to get in (Come on! Go on in!!). Looked like a spaniel/basset mix who was not convinced that getting in the car was a good idea as owner thought.

  69. Now I’ve never had a dog give me the “soft kronsche” on the behind, but uh, aherm, eh…look, a chocolate lab.

    Hey, if we had a chocolate lab at the dream office, could we all wear chocolate lab coats during our ex-speariments?

  70. In order: I want that gorgeous tile; I want the beautiful lab; I want the baby . . .

  71. I think HRH Squeak needs to archive Astrid Jane’s comment for posterior… erm… posterity, even if it isn’t technically verse or lyrics.

  72. Astrid Jane, there isn’t any part of my “jelly getting hoovered into a big wet mouth..” etc. that I wouldn’t enjoy.

    Oh wait you are talking about a dog doing that… ah well, I might enjoy that too.

    As for the Chocolab, you know that tongue is getting up in there betwixt the toesies!

  73. I want a puppeh so baaaadd.. but I want a corgi.. even though McLabersons are.. in my book the second best dogs in the world.. next to the evar intelligent McCorgisons.. ohh.. too much time spent on CO..
    [head s'plodes]
    ☺☻☺☻☺☻☺☻☺☻☺☻☺☻☺

  74. Dude, no show yet???

    Well, I’d go to the rackage to see some fur fly, only, well, I’m at work. So…

    Back to work.

  75. They’re both lying the in the classic “flying frog” position. :D

  76. ChapeauNoir says:

    Greetings, COers, I am a huge CO fan and sometime lurker but have never posted before. Just HAD to this time! That baby looks IZZACKLY like my daughter did as a baby and my mom had a beagle who did that legs-stretched-out-the-back thing — so cute! I guess I have to get that tile now.

  77. Choco-Lab: They don’t pay me enough for baby sitting this brat! Come back here you…(soft-kronshe!)

  78. This has to be a new CO record for a pic of this type. There are over 70 comments and I have yet to find a nuffy one….

  79. EricaE: (finger to lips)SSHHHhhhhhhh…..

  80. wolfwhocriedboy says:

    astrid jane – I just about lost control of my bodily functions reading your story. The lab-bum-hoover really needs to be archived on CO somewhere. ;)

    Now I know why the latest “racks” picture has so many posts. I think I’ll avoid. Thanks for the heads-up everyone.

  81. “the baby is kicking the puppy in the mouth” *giggles*

  82. You’re all missing that this is a photo-shopped piece! They’re really swimmin’ and the lab is saving the baby. Someone just ‘shopped the water out of the photo.

  83. Behold, the Law of Unintended Readings:

    “Hey, if we had a chocolate lab at the dream office, could we all wear chocolate lab coats during our ex-speariments?”

    Dunno–how many chocolate lab pelts does it take to make a coat?

  84. It’s a canine-kiddie conga line.

  85. When I was very small (ie, ca. 6 months old — we won’t even contemplate how long ago that was…), my parents got a Boxer puppy of roughly the same age. (Clue to the uncontemplated: his registered name was [Kennel]‘s Brown Bomber of Simi… His namesake had retired not that long ago.)

    At the time, we were living in a rural area, in a tiny rented house across the road from my folks’ walnut grove, in which they were having a new home built. There were big trucks and so forth going up and down that road all the time.

    One day, after Mom had done laundry and was hanging it up outdoors, with me (she thought) happily playing at her feet, she was startled to hear my voice, raised in vociferous protest, coming from the driveway in front of the house. Apparently, I had wandered away when she wasn’t looking, and headed for the wide open spaces beyond our yard. Bomber, good dog that he was, had followed me, and, just a couple of feet from the buzy road, had grabbed my diaper in his muzzlepouch and firmly sat down. Since he was behind me, I couldn’t even reach him to slap him, and he was impervious to verbal assault.

    Mom scooped me up safely and made sure I was confined in a play-pen or the house thereafter. And Bomber never wanted for anything as long as we had him.

    (He ended up standing at stud for his breeder, so I expect he had a good life even after we moved into the city and had insufficient room for him. Our current dog is a boxer mix who shows very little of the other side of his family, chosen at least partially because of Bomber…)

  86. No, ElliotM, bad comment!
    I meant, of course, a lab coat made out of chocolate. An edible clothing item, if I may be so bold.

  87. You may, and I was jk.

  88. hrh.squeak says:

    Well, I’d be up to archive it under a new category – say, Tales from the Cute Side? I know a few wonderful stories have been told, like Zosterop’s (sp?) rattie thanking her for the biskit rescue, or the opossum in the toilet, or or or . . . . What thinkest thou, o Peeps?

  89. I think Tales from the Cute Side is a great idea. I’ve seen many a story here that made me laugh but who can keep track of them? We have Tails from the Cute Side (aka “tocks”) now we need Tales. Who’s with us?

    p.s. Love the Baby and the Kronsher. No question the Kronsher is saving the Baby from some dire fate just out of the picture. “Stop! Go no further!” etc.

  90. YES, Tales from the Cute Side!

    (At last, my Feeding a Hateful Squirrel an Altoid story would have a proper home…)

  91. On the plus side, at least the dog’s between the baby and the patio/porch railing. I have visions of Michael Jackson as those railings don’t look like they’d block a wiggling baby.

    Course that could be a groundfloor apt given apparent grass on the tiles.

  92. BTW, if you think feeding a squirrel an Altoid is fun, try feeding a pigeon wasabi.

  93. WickedWendy says:

    Those must be some tasty toes!!! Yum!!!

  94. Appe-toes-ers.
    (I’m training at the feet of Aubrey.)

  95. LC:

    Cane-pets?
    Antipastoe?

  96. Meg keeps torturing me with photos of giant puppies. I’m so jealous I could cry!

  97. Emc^2 my Nan has a similar story!
    When she was about 2 yrs old (this was the early 1930s in Wales) her family owned a small shop and she’d sit outside taking to the policeman directing traffic.
    Their dog (I think it was a great dane) would sit with her and if she started going to close to the road it would take the back of her dress in it’s teeth and gently guide her back to safety.

    And a big AWW! to the baby and it’s toe nibbling furry friend!

  98. Redzilla…. YES Choc-lab coats and waffle cones for beekers!! Fruit stripes for microscope slides….and pie crust for petri dishes.

  99. Aww, man, I check out this post to check out the inevitable commentroversy and all I get are comments about how cute the lab is! I even brought some pudding (and brandy)… Now I can’t use it.

    And I didn’t even get any Junior Mints!

    : (

  100. w00t! 100th post! (For some reason that excites me. Obviously I’m a little bored and procrastinatory. Don’t hurt me, Theo.)

    I think I just made up a word. But shouldn’t “procrastinatory” exist?

    Lovely pup, by the way.

  101. I’ll have to call the vocabulary constabulary, Alexis.

    (digs into pockets)

    Here. Have a mint.

  102. Melissa (tired of boobies) says:

    So what did I miss while I was busy spectating the war going on a few posts down? anyone against doggies biting babies? coooooooome on, there’s gotta be someone out there!

    (it’s all fun and games until someone loses a toe…)

  103. don’t want the tile floor, don’t want the baby… but I NEED that puppy!

  104. “Vocabulary constabulary”… I like that. Makes my life sound a little less drabulary.
    ;-)

  105. There’s entirely too little commentroversy going on here.

    Ahem. Gah! What on EARTH DO THEY THINK THEY’RE DOING??? Who knows WHERE that baby’s foot has been! And they let their poor puppy lick it??? Give that puppy a tetanus shot, stat!

    But seriously, this is a sweet pic. The puppy reminds me of my family’s chocolate lab. He was a very gentle doggy.

  106. Hannah, can I add some drama by SHOUTING VERY LOUDLY that I WANT A DAWG and it’s SO NOT FAIR that so many people have dawgs and I DON’T?!?

    Hrrmph! *stamps foot and flops ears about*

  107. Agh! The reprehensible abuse! It’s overwhelmingly CUTE! What’s wrong with me? :) Both the baby’s fat dumpling limbs and the puppy’s flopped pose is just too much.

  108. OMG BABIES!!1

  109. I personally would have been terrified if a dog had done that to me when I was a kid. However, I was unusually scared of dogs because in order to go to the playground, I had to walk by a house where the only thing separating me and a scary Doberman was a chain-link fence, and I thought the Doberman wanted to eat me. The baby doesn’t look upset, though, so it’s cute.

  110. Alexis, you didn’t get a mint?

    Shocking! Here, please have the rest of my box, there’s gotta be at least a dozen left.

  111. lol my cavvy does that to my dads feet in summer, she licks and licks and licks at it and the grazes at it with her teeth, he tries to take it away because it tickles but she’ll put her paws around it and continue the salty good experience, wierd things…..

  112. Christy, I was in the same situation when I was a tiny kid, only it was a barky Afghan Hound on the way to the bus stop. I loved all other dogs, it was just that one in particular that terrified me.

    I still don’t like Afghan Hounds much.

  113. Oh my god i used to be terrified of dogs when i was like 10 so i don’t know is that sad or just weird ?? but anyways, whats the baby thinking about this i was wondering because theres just a massive labrador nibbling her foot , lols.

    Cute pic anyways =] x

  114. My faith in Co has been restored!!! THIS is what cute looks like! I know I annoyed some of you ferret-lovers ealier but COME ON people! Rodents are an acquired taste whereas who does not love a baby being chomped by a puppy? I wish I were there so I could have a contest for who has the softest head-fuzz, the baby or the puppy. I think the baby would win, but I still want to pet them both! :-)

  115. Feet. It’s what’s for dinner!

    (my student came up with that)

  116. Feet. It’s what’s for dinner!

    (my student came up with that)

  117. Shocked. SHOCKED, people! How did we manage a post like this with this many comments with no commentroversy?

    Wow. Maybe that anti-Nuff spray is working.

  118. nah, it’s just that all the nuffers got distracted by the boobage and haven’t made it here yet. It’s ok. this is a safe, happy, cute place!

  119. I can’t believe nobody put this yet—

    FREE-TOES! They’re what’s for dinner!

    (get it- Fritos/Free-toes…)

    Ahhh I slay myself. :)

  120. Dazie – I like Fritos sLays myself, too.

  121. There’s one lone little nuffer up there, crying out in the wildnerness. It seems like there needs to be a certain number of nuffinghams (or a certain degree of vitriol in their nuffness) _and_ a certain number of enthusiastically (rabidly?) pro-Cuters to get a good commentroversy going on. Someone good in math/stats could probably work out the formula for a good commentroversy. If they get that done and Meg figures out the right sort of Cute for the day… devastating commentroversy numbers. We could set new heights. :)

  122. For people who don’t like it when there’s a lot of “commentroversy” on posts, there sure are a lot of people just begging to see some on this picture…

    Let’s just look at the cute picture everyone…

  123. sldkjfl;k – Thank You. THANK you. Thank YOU.
    I add, there is no such thing as a “good commentroversy”.

  124. That’s ’cause controversy is fun sometimes–in that same sort of “I can’t believe I’m watching reality TV” way.

    I think the perfect bait-the-nuffingham photo would include:
    A rack
    A rodent
    A reptile
    A baby.
    Maybe an insect of some sort for extra credit.

    Though I’m not sure how cute it would be. A professional could probably swing it. (And I apologize for the number of times I typed “commentroversy” in that last comment. I was a little enthusiastic.

  125. ewolfe – Cool.

  126. I’m so happy there were not any *OMG that POOR BABY!* comments.

    SO CUTE. You can just see a little bubble over the dogs head “Oh no you dont kid!”

    I love the comments on here. The one about the dog mouthing butts is my favorite. Astrid Jane you rock for sharing that story!

  127. Netherland Dwarf rabbit, owner!!♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ says:

    Cute likety spit pic!
    Toe…toe adorable!!
    Sweet nibblets!

  128. For the record, ferrets are not rodents.

  129. Martha in Washington says:

    Melissa (tired of boobies)-“it’s all fun and games until someone loses a toe” then it’s a WHOLE NEW GAME!!

  130. Martha in Washington says:

    I bet that baby has the cleanest toes in the neighborhood!

  131. ScorpioSpirit says:

    It looks like there are no teefs involved on the dog part, more just muzzlepouch schflumping. (if you know what I mean by schflumping). Luvving the way the baby hasn’t noticed he’s being toe-prodded.

  132. Michelle–no one said they were. I was thinking, actually, of the picture of the rat in the pantry that was up some time ago.

  133. Thanks for the offers of Junior Mints, guys.

    Chocolate lab, chocolate candy. What could be better?

    (Just don’t give one to the other: “Chocolate’s not good for dogs!”)

  134. Michelle–ahem, rereading the above, I stand corrected. Someone did call them rodents above. You’re right, my bad. I think this will be my last CO comment. I always get myself in trouble. And I don’t have any brilliant puns to add to the party. I envy Aubrey!

  135. Ewolfe, if you’re still around, then stay around awhile! An apundance of punnage is not needed to enter the portals of the cute!

  136. Am I the only one whose toes curled in tickle reflex when I saw this? Lab lips on bare toes make me need to scratch my feet against each other, every single time I see it. And yet I can’t stop looking at it.

  137. man hope the dog dont ave soars in its mouth

  138. minnesnowtah says:

    ^ Nah, I’m sure it doesn’t.

    “It’s a canine-kiddie conga line.”
    – you’re right!

  139. My dog did that to one of my dolls when I was little… mom glued three toes back and one was lost forever. :D

  140. I saw this picture and imediately thought to the Mastiff head meets Baby Back. XD;;

    Luck be with thee, it seems those comments didn’t spawn up in this one! ^_^

    Doesn’t that Lab look a wee bit wee itself? :o Pupby!

  141. Now with twice as much toe fiber, it’s TastyBaby! The snack for dogs!

  142. “Rodents are an acquired taste whereas who does not love a baby being chomped by a puppy?”

    Monique, some folks like puppies, some likes ferrets, some like rats :)
    Ferrets are not rats, BTW. They are related to otters, ermine and other mustelids.

  143. Brak_Silverbone says:

    “Hold on there, kiddo, you got a li’l peanut butter there on your toes…” *schlurp schlurp schlurp*

  144. Jaypo-

    “Why is that baby kicking the puppy in the mouth? ;-)”

    -Too funny!Just hope that baby’s toenails aren’t sharp!

  145. Baybeee!!! Puppeeeee!!!

    Oh, its a chocolate lab! Then thats a “Kronshe” for sure. Labs are the gentlest lovemonsters EVER.

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