So I ate a few extra hotdogs at the July 4th BBQ?! SO WHAT. I caught you eating a frozen Snickers yesterday, so shuddyup.



Dave R., I love how even his tail looks heavy… [sigh]



  1. LilyPad says:

    Poor Baby! Can he even get up a tree?!

  2. ooooh, it is so squishable and fat. i can almost see it try to climb a tree.
    “ehn, ehn…..aw screw eet!” ::lays down and naps with a bag of chips::

  3. I’m not “fat”, I’m “fluffy”!!!

  4. Holy porksplosion… DID THIS SQUIRREL EAT THE CHIPMUNK??

  5. Courtney says:

    what the heck is that?! Is that really a fat squirrel, or is it some other kind of rodent? (a pika…?)

  6. Holy porkslposion is right… and I thought I had fat squirrels in my backyard!

  7. Tony James says:

    Meanwhile, it’s PMS day over at the Rock Hyrax house…
    “Let me tell ya something, mister – when you’ve borne 5 children and kept the house looking nice and made an effort to be a good hostess and a loving wife and a caring mother, then maybe your hips will be a little chunky too! So maybe I don’t look like I did when I was 20, but if you can tell me when you think I have the time to primp and powder and work-out in between cooking, cleaning, grocery shopping, picking up your dry cleaning and shuttling your kids all over town while you’re at that oh-so-precious job of yours…”

  8. I have just fallen off my chair. This creature’s defense against predators…not running up a tree. It’s more like, he looks at the fox and says, “You’re kidding me, right, pipsqueak? Two bites o’ me and your arteries are going to slam shut. I’m 65% fat. I make Wendy’s Triple Bacon Cheeseburger look like health food.”

  9. chelsea says:

    I think there should be a new rule of cuteness: feet to body size ratio. How does this guy NOT break his teeny legs and feet??!

  10. He’s not fat. He’s big-boned!

  11. mariser says:

    to second Courtney’ question:
    or is it a

  12. AuntieMame says:

    Bwah! He looks like he swallowed a bowling ball!

    Maybe this is the guy who broke the hotdog eating world record yesterday.

  13. omg, I can’t stop looking at it… Now seriously… Meg – where did this picture come from??? What’s the rest of the story???

  14. I know how he feels.

  15. madhatter says:

    This is sad. The poor things has probably been overfed.

  16. In the immortal words of Catherine Aird, “If you can’t be a good example, then you’ll just have to serve as a horrible warning.”

  17. Lillith says:

    He’s not fat, he’s zaftig! 😉

  18. OH MY GOD!!!!

    That poor thing is obscene!

    I have never in my life seen an obese squirrel!

    Wow… this is something I will never forget….

  19. skwerl: No, no…I couldn’t eat another bite…no really…

    skwerl girlfriend: But I made your favorite acorn pie….

    skwerl: gosh, it looks so yummy…but I’m sooo fulll

    skwerl girlfriend: *pouts*

    skwerl: ok, ok…put whip cream on it…

    come late fall our skwerls fatten themselves up kind a like this, and then when it’s cold they will sit on our fence all huddled/puffed for warmth…this leetle fatty guy looks just like our skwerls before they go into hibernation…

  20. “Look – squirrels are supposed to hibernate; and before going into that deep sleep, we’re supposed to eat, eat and eat to stock up on the extra pounds and…what?


  21. brownamazon says:

    Reality TV hits a new low.

    The Biggest Loser: rodent edition.

  22. Rokkin’ captions, Meg!

    I’m still giggling…

  23. I take it this isn’t one of those NYC skee-whirls mentioned in the chipmunk thread. I think someone’s friend will freak out if she sees this one!

  24. I’ve seen a squirrel that is _nearly_ that fat on my college campus. It drapes itself over (straddles) a tree limb, hangs its little feet and “cusses” at passerbys. It’s the Archie Bunker of squirrels.

  25. Squirrels this fat are seen most often in the fall, squished in the street. Not as fast as they think they are. But the cars are! 😦

  26. Hm. I really wanna offer him a ‘wafer-thin mint’…

    But, Mr. Creosote aside, I must say: I love fat animals! Chubby furry bellies *rule* 🙂

  27. Seriously – absent pointy ears and long tail, it looks very like a groundhog.

  28. That picture reminds me of a prarie dog on my site..lol but of course it’s not. Did you really eat hedghog?? I hope not. 🙂 wow. I am cute overloaded! XD

  29. His momma tells all the eligible girl squirrels “…he has a great personality, really.”

  30. He must be on one of those new diet plans. LOL

  31. It’s true…the camera really does add 10 lbs.!

    LOL @ Mr. Creosote…”Get me a bucket!”

  32. SING…”Livin’ in fast forward, hillbilly squirrel star, out of control…Livin’ in fast forward…now I need to rewind real slow…” Talk about livin in fast forward … squirrel edition!

  33. It’s from worth 1000 guys, its the Obeastity contest.

  34. Skwerlon Brando? Wait, no…Jabba the Skwerl?

  35. Please tell me this photo is from the Fall, there’s no reason for a skwerl to be this fat in July!
    (I bet he’s good eatin’ for park dwellers…)

  36. Is that what that is, Tony James, a Rock Hyrax? I have read about them…don’t think I have ever seen one!

    This one is making me short of breath just looking at him!

    But he deserves a kiss on the schmuzzle just the same!

  37. This guy needs to watch some of Squirlie Maclaine’s exercise videos.

  38. Alright everyone, lets not get all ‘SKWERLY’ over this… (bwhahhaahaha!)

  39. Brak_Silverbone says:

    Wow, I think this skwrl swallowed a hedgehog!


    What a porker.

  41. Lardass squirrel. I’m laughing and crying both.

  42. Does anyone else see the Marlon Brando of the squirrel world? I can hear him making an offer I “can’t refuse”.

  43. This photo was taken last August in Pebble Beach, CA. This was at one of the stops along the 17-Mile Drive where the local wildlife tends to be fed a lot of snacks. It was a ground dweller amongst the rocks near the shore — I assumed it was a squirrel of some sort.

    Given the season, perhaps its extreme girth is also due to it getting ready for hibernation.

  44. Whatever the season, he’s still too damn cute. 🙂 Definitely not a Florida squirrel, as they are all skinny down here. Up north in the Wisconsin/Illinois area, dang, they got big. But they had to in order to survive.

  45. “What a shame. And such a pretty face…”

  46. Laurie C says:

    He needs to talk to the chipmunk about wearing vertical stripes. They’re very slimming.

  47. (Fat Albert voice):
    “Hey, Hey, Hey!”

  48. The Guy Over There says:

    Shouldn’t this be a cute or sad thing? I was going to mention the P-word, too, but didn’t want to wash my mouth with soap for the twelfth time today.

    Seriously, this looks like something out of Rotten.com .

  49. Jaypo:
    Don’t worry; I’m sure he has a lovely personality.

  50. Cauliflower says:

    It’s a marmot with a squirrels head…or is a squirrel with a marmots body?

  51. It’s just a squirrel ready for winter … a bit early lol.

    I guess the snacks make it a bit too easy to fatten up but they do need to store the extra fat for the winter month. Most of them in the city look like fat balls of fluff come fall.

  52. The more I look at this picture, with those amazing captions, the harder I laugh. Too funny!

  53. hrh.squeak says:

    Does anyone else here see a distinct resemblance to Mr. Dursley? “Hurry up with my breakfast, boy!”

  54. Now thats one fat pet!

  55. Nagi-kun says:

    THat’s no moon…


  56. Maybe it’s a hybrid between a squirrel and a pufferfish!
    The new Macy’s Thanksgiving parade balloon!
    Helium overload on an Inflate-a-Squirrel!
    Just some possibilities….

  57. the honourable Gladys Anstruther says:

    Youcud sure get a tasty meal outa that critter. Mighty good eatin with some grits

  58. Has nobody considered that this squirrel might be a lady squirrel? A knocked-up lady squirrel? They get big bellies when they are full of babies, just like every other species 😛

  59. Ok. I can see that no-one is going to take responsibility. So I’ll just have to say it, then:

    OMG, this is CRUEL! ABUSE!

    This poor little squirrel hasn’t starved, and NOW look at him! He clearly is in distress, his joints have to be HORRIBLY dislocated, he’s out of breath, and he’s the laughing stock of his friends AND of the WHOLE WORLD thanks to CO and the internet.

    And I know what I’m talking about, because I’m the über-general-dictator of the Foundation Against Fat, Unhappy, Distressed Animals On The Internet For The Horrid Entertainment Of The Ignorant Masses.

  60. Laurie C says:

    Nickole – you must mean “International” Foundation of the Whatever, Whatever… Do you have a Squirrel Mockery Division?

  61. Yeah, sure!

    You, Laurie, are my hottest candidate for the job as over-king-chief of the I.F.A.F.U.D.A.O.T.I.F.T.H.E.O.T.I.M, S.M.D. (Or Mockery Foundation for short.)

  62. Ifafuda Otif *Theo* Tims, MD

    His real identity?

  63. coconut says:

    maybe it’s a pregnant squirrel. aaawww…poor thing is so fat it’s mouth is hanging open

  64. aww!!!! this is what all animals should be shaped like! (but without any health problems, obviously.) I just want to pick him up and squish him against my face! …many times in a row. 😀

  65. jenni joon says:

    He’s not *fat* per se… he is… healthy. Yes. That’s it. Healthy. Very, very, VERY healthy. Man– he looks like how I felt after all the crap I ingested this past holiday! Great pic!

  66. Does this rock make me look fat?

  67. Rawther Rubenesque, I must say!

  68. Now I want, like, a million frozen Snickers!

  69. THANK YOU whoever mentioned Mr. Creosote… that’s exactly what I thought. 😀 I’d hate to see this poor “little” guy spilling his guts all over the place though… ew.

    Nickole, you are my hero.

  70. I’m going with “pregnant,” myself. Makes sense to me. She is cute!!

  71. “Ifafuda Otif *Theo* Tims, MD

    His real identity?”

    Yes jaypo. It’s his SECRET identity, actually.


    Ehm, Theo? I might have busted your secret identity a teeny, little bit.


  72. So I’m supposed to be “The Horrid Entertainment Of”… something? THAT’S my secret identity??

    Anyway, I thought I already had one:

  73. I don’t know about the particular squirrel pictured above, but I’ll tell you about the morbidly obese squirrel of my childhood, Freddie. My family lived in the suburbs, and we had a sliding glass door in the kitchen overlooking a brick patio surrounded by trees. Freddie the squirrel would show up in the morning, eating acorns, while my sister (4 years old) and I (8 years old) would have breakfast. One day mum decided it would be okay if we fed Freddie some peanut butter. He liked it and came to expect it EVERY day. It really didn’t take long to make Freddie very fat and unhealthy. Then he stopped showing up suddenly. I think he must have exploded alone somewhere.

    I used to reminisce on this story with fondness, but I have since grown a bitter, bitter woman and see squirrels as not-so-bad to see photographs of and experience from a distance in a park…but otherwise I see them pretty much as just vermin, because I’m such a broken and emotionally unstable excuse for a spiritual being, etc. I’d never feed peanut butter to a squirrel. Let them find their own nuts and seeds. asses. by the way, nests of baby squirrels are REALLY gross and verminesque.

  74. To be “The Horrid Entertainment Of” something is not at all that bad a destiny, is it?

    Bar the “Horrid”, of course, but that’s your own fault, you know, for spelling your name with an H.

  75. Look at the crease above its nose! It even has a fat forehead. I wonder if it has “hot dog neck” like fat bald humans get!

  76. It’s a campus Squirrel!!!!
    Similar cheeky (Hey come back w that breadstick!) squirrels were practically the unofficial mascot at my university. We (UofH) even have a nice giant squirrel statue near the science building.

  77. I’m voting for pregnant. Ground squirrels in central/south CA are active all year, I see ’em every time we drive up the coast.
    Also voting for vermin. Pretty tweedy fur notwithstanding.
    That said, it’s a great photo, DaveR – crystal clear, wonderful tight focus.

  78. *snickers* poor squirrel, someone should tell him that the Subway Diet Plan is for HUMANS.

  79. Sigh. This poor thing is so cute and so needs a membership to 24 fitness.

  80. The Guy Over There says:

    “Rubenesque.” That is the coolest word I heard all this month. This squirrel clearly could be used for some artwork of the Burlesque period, lounging on a voluptuous woman nibbling on a doughnut.

  81. In response to Ann’s comment, I also had a fat squirrel on my college campus. Almost every day I would look out my dorm room window and see him trying to climb the ivy on the building. He would get halfway up and the ivy would start to peel off the wall from his weight and he’d just hang there as it continued to rip away from the wall. Poor guy, I don’t think he lived very long. Must be a thyroid condition.

  82. “Verminesque”– my favorite new word!

  83. “Rock hyrax”? Nah, TJ, this is yer average Fat Skwerl. (Sorry it’s not a bit more exotic…!)

  84. Man, Vanadis does not lie. U of H squirrels will mug you for snack foods. Or foods of any sort. They are AGGRESSIVE.

  85. A Human Being says:

    Obese is the new cute?

    Nah doesn’t really fit!

  86. bloated but still a beauty! 🙂 i absolutely love this pic! 🙂

  87. Hilarious!

  88. Tony James says:

    Ms. Collison – are you sure that it’s a chubby skwerl? The tail is unskwerlesque, and the pose is untypical. Maybe it’s a marmot?

  89. Tony James says:

    Badger badger badger magical trevor KENYA!