Redonkulous Coupon

Sometimes, simply saying you’d like to give someone a hamster is nicer than actually giving them one. For those special, special occasions, you need the "Free Hamster Coupon" below. Simply download it and give it to your favorite person. Be warned, they might try and redeem it.

Download Free_Hamster_Coupon.pdf

Don’t forget to sign it!




  1. Second prize, TWO free hamsters!

  2. That is so great! I was literally just thinking I should get a hamster for a particular friend, but then worried that they might not be as excited about it as I am. You read my mind, this perfect, thanks CO!

  3. woo-hoo! maybe I’ll give one to myself 😉

  4. 😦 i really wanted the hamster tshirt

  5. Oooh, I’m going to have to get my husband to give me one of these! He won’t let me have a hamster- worried our kitties will eat it. 🙂

  6. Can I have one for a puppy instead? Perferably, a coupon for a puppy that comes with a complimentry blue hose?

  7. chunkstyle says:

    Is it possible to have cats and a hamster in the same house without making all pets involved feel frustrated??
    I too want a hammie…have 2 kittehs.

  8. This is great! I’m getting my nephew his long-awaited Hamster for his birthday this August. This is way better than sticking a gift certificate in a card, because he can use it at any pet shop or animal shelter & it so much cuter. Thank you for making dreams come true!

  9. cute, but no substitute for a YIN YANG KITTENS TSHIRT! WHY are you taunting us this way???

  10. I love it!

  11. bunnajenny says:

    When we lived in California, our mittens spent their holidays at Kitty Hill Resort for Cats. Kitty Hill had a resident hammie, Professor Blossom, for nocturnal observation by the felines. They kept her safe in a sturdy cage and its top was held securely in place by a ratcheting tie down. I don’t know if either side was frustrated or not, but the hammie was certainly safe.

  12. I notice that in the lower right hand corner it confirms that the coupon ‘expires never’.

    Now that’s a beautiful thing.

  13. I don’t have a hammie, but I have too fancy mices with my kittehs. Yes, the trick is in a very sturdy screen lid on an aquarium. (The screen needs to have structural support in multiple places, so kittehs can’t sit their plumpness on top and sag in the roof.) My mices don’t seem to mind being watched fervently, and kittehs love the show. Only occasional problem: Flanny the blue cat, she sometimes spins her head round and round to watch Dorito the mouse run on his wheel. Then, she pukes. Otherwise, good times had by all.

  14. Meg, this is ultra-cool, not to mention “prosh.”

    Wish I could have one for imaginary extra bunnies and a horse or two…!

  15. How prosh! ^_^

  16. Maureen says:

    I miss my hammie. He looked just like the CO T-Shirt hammie, too.

    Poor little bastard’s only been dead for 4 days, too.

    No more hammie’s for me. It’s way too hard to see them go. I went to work the next day and told my secretary and promptly started crying again.

    …/sigh. I should have bought a T-Shirt.

  17. oh! i’m sending this to my husband…and telling him to print out, like, ten of them! 🙂

  18. brownamazon says:

    Has anyone noticed that it’s hmaster AD INFINITUM? It’s holding a free hamster coupon, which shows a hamster holding a free hamster coupon… the mind boggles, people!

  19. hedgedog says:

    “…Flanny the blue cat, she sometimes spins her head round and round to watch Dorito the mouse run on his wheel. Then, she pukes. Otherwise, good times had by all.”
    I’m SO sorry for Flanny, but you’ve just made me laugh sprayed hazelnut ice-cream all over my laptop…
    (scrub scrub scrub)

  20. hrh.squeak says:

    Hedgedog – second that. The image of Flanny doing that will not get out of my mind, and I keep giggling madly. Redzilla, can we get a pic of her? (Perhaps not during the inevitable-result phase.)

  21. Redzilla!! Hilarious!!

    (maybe a video?)

  22. Sorry to rain on the parade here, but I think this is a LOUSY idea. Animals aren’t (expletive)g party favors. They require care and attention and shouldn’t be so (expletive)g easy to get.

  23. Sorry to rain on the parade here, but I think this is a LOUSY idea. Animals aren’t (expletive)g party favors. They require care and attention and shouldn’t be so (expletive)g easy to get. This sends a lousy message. I wonder how many of these free animals will die of neglect or be released into a lot or backyard to be eaten by predators or die of thirst.

  24. Kristin Schaffrick says:

    the whole idea is just stupid and it is a waste of time. sorry to be the party pooper, but the truth hurts.

  25. Nickole says:

    Yeah, well, Cathryn, I think that’s the point, really. You DON’T give anyone a hamster, you just give them this card, which shows that you would like to give them one. Only you don’t, because you don’t know if they really want one.

  26. Hedgedog says:

    Aw – it’s just for fun. Noone is going to flourish around that coupon to get an hammie. Mostly because THAT WON’T WORK, I’m afraid, but… I think if you have frequented this site you should know people here know pets and respect them… well, -_-… except for the little episodic feet-tugging and raspberry-blowing and laughing at poor micia-Flanny…

  27. I printed the coupon and gave it to my boyfriend. He laughed at me and put it up on the fridge.

    He later pointed out that the hamster on the coupon is holding a copy of a tiny coupon so he can get an even tinier hamster and all his even tinier accoutrements!

    And someone is taking this a little too seriously… It’s cute. Not life threatening.
    One word: Silly.

  28. TheLuna says:

    Can I have just the tiny accoutrements?

    /getting way too much entertainment out of that phrase 🙂

  29. Saahira says:

    the comments on here crack me up… someone actually thought this was a real coupon and that you were giving out real live hamsters… lmao… redonkulous! oh the sheer audacity that you would torture poor hamsters by giving them away so easily… rotflmao… giggle snort…

    oh, and poor poor flanny….. (snort)

  30. The beauty is in the silly.

  31. Lee Gibson says:

    Wow. Looks like some folks need some perspective. And a hug.

    “and shouldn’t be so (expletive)g easy to get”

    Good think it’s not up to you then, huh?

    Do you seriously want people calling you up in the middle of the night (it’s always daytime somewhere) asking if they can have a pet?

  32. Cpt. Blood says:

    Does anyone else see something wrong with a Hamster having in possession a Free Hamster coupon?

    For one hamster to hold in his/her possession the deeds to another hamster’s life is quite chilling.

    I shan’t be participating.

  33. TheLuna says:

    Have a heart, Cpt. Blood – maybe that hamster just needs a friend.

  34. Big hams have little hams, in coupons in their handsies,
    and little hams have lesser hams, and on into infinities.

  35. Holier Than Thou says:

    Umm…excuse ME, but this is such a BAD idea. Now EVERYONE who prints one of these coupons out will now STEAL hamsters from the pet store because this OBVIOUSLY entitles them to a free hamster. And then there will be a mass hamster shortage. And they will all end up getting squished and abandoned and hated and steamrolled and murdered and stomped on and eaten by octopi. You all are so cruel to animals and obviously must hate every animal you see, which is sad. I am the only person in the world who knows anything about hamsters and I would never do anything like this because I am apparently the only animal lover here.

    I repeat: This is OBVIOUSLY a REAL COUPON and everyone should take this threat of Mass Hamster Destruction very seriously. You are Hamster Terrorists. Thank you.

  36. gimme that ham!

  37. Heehee, this is so adorable! I printed it out and gave it to my boyfriend and make him smile 🙂 It’s like a hammie valentine!

    (Oh, but i totally predicted there would be people going “OMG THIS IS EVIL!” on the thread before i even read the comments … people, what store would accept this coupon? If you happen to know, please enlighten me)

  38. Dear party poopers,

    Um, people aren’t idiot robots. We understand what animals need. I know you have a need to express self-righteous more-sensitive-than-thou-ness at every opportunity, but mebbie CO isn’t the place to do so, ‘m’kay?

  39. Cpt. Blood says:

    On the contrary, it is having a heart which has brought me to posting.

    What type of friendship do you portend to develop out of this sort of arrangement?

    A forced friendship, a one-sided friendship, a slave-master friendship, that’s what.

    A fine oxymoron it is to see a coupon entitled “Free Hamster.”

    A captive hamster is what I see and it is not cute. A disdainful hamster-slave-trader is who is represented on the coupon. A swarthy rascal who offers an ignominious sum of $0.00
    to own the fate of a powerless fellow hamster.

    “Free Hamster?” –According to who’s perspective?

  40. … it’s called a joke… comeo on people do you honestly think every pet store int he world will take this? Do you think ANY will take this? Its for ones own amusement!
    But it is uberly cute!

  41. AuntieMame says:

    And since it’s apparently not “bleeding obvious” (as Basil Fawlty would say), I’d just like to point out that this is a FAKE coupon, and there isn’t a pet store on the planet that’s going to start handing out free hamsters, just because you shove a coupon up their noses.

    (You wouldn’t think something like that would need to be pointed out…)

  42. AuntieMame says:

    (P.S. LOL, Cpt. Blood!)

  43. “A forced friendship, a one-sided friendship, a slave-master friendship, that’s what.”

    Does this mean you think the free human I got for my last birthday is being mistreated? [sniff]

  44. Holier Than Thou says:

    I really, -really- hope nobody thought my comment was serious.

  45. AuntieMame says:

    I don’t think so, HTH. If all the capitalizations weren’t a clue, then “mass hamster shortage” should have tipped people off. And if not that, then surely “squished and abandoned and hated and steamrolled and murdered and stomped on and eaten by octopi” was a dead giveaway.


  46. brownamazon says:

    HTT: “eaten by octopi”. Love!

  47. Cpt. Blood says:

    TheLuna, I consider you a very considerate property owner. Your human should indeed consider himself fortuitious and thankful for his comparitively easy and clean condition.

    I understand that you allow your human to move freely about, and though you carry your bamboo cane about as a constant tactful reminder, you are conservative in it’s use. For that your human must surely be kindly hearted.

  48. Ah, finally, a coupon. Thanks!

  49. Passenger says:

    What to do with your free hamster:

  50. I want a coupon for a free *snorgle* from a cute critter of my choice. I chooooose puppy heaven puppy!

  51. warrior rabbit says:

    lol on what to do with your free hamster…

    Hmm, maybe I could redeem a bunch of hamstertificates and start a hamster phone bank, get a 900 #, and charge $1 per minute! Brilliant!

  52. Well everyone will take sides on something like this, really. The sadtruth is that there ARE idiots who think pets make great gifts. And there ARE stupid people who will get a pet on a whim, or for their three year-old. BUT what if this was a joke, or perhaps, as one person so kindly pointed out, it was used for someone who wanted and would take care of the pet humanely and now, not being given a gift crad, would seek one from a shelter?

  53. Sad truth….

    Expires: In about two years

  54. Dang it! Just caught my cats in here printing off Free Hammie coupons! So much for responsible pet ownership…I really need to get Kitteh Filtering Software for this thing.

  55. Red,
    Symancat has some pretty good products that you might want to consider.

  56. “The beauty is in the silly.”

    Aubrey, methinks you’ve hit the nail most squarely on the head!

    Arvay, I like yer rhymin’ I does….

  57. Laurie C says:

    Holier Than Thou, loved the acronym embedded in your tag “WMHD” for “Weapons of Mass Hamster Destruction”. God is in the details.

  58. hee! at everyone. most especially Redzilla’s cats. clever beings, aren’t they.

  59. @ arvay: That was supposed to be “Oi loikes yer rhymin’, Oi duz.” (Imagine atrociously bad “stage” Cockeny accent and you’ve got it – will admit to talking in this, err, “accent” to my bun-rab She can’t talk back, so I don’t know if she’s amazed at my cleverness or thinks I need to go to a dialect coach ;-))

  60. Err, make that “Cockney.”

    I really *cannot* type well!

  61. OCTUPIIIIIIIIIII! They will take over the world!

    Hee heeheeeee! I love you guys! You know, TheLuna, *my* parents got a free human on my birthday a while back. They were pretty nice to her, I have to say, and did a wonderful job bringing her up. 😉

  62. hrh.squeak says:

    Good lord, Passenger, that was so hilariously twisted! Hahaha! Do all hamsters do household chores, or only the Japanese ones?
    Aubrey-sama, you are the Master.

  63. “Holier THan Thou,” My sister and I just snorted wine out our respective noses at your comment—BRAVO!!!

  64. “Belle” Are you serious? Were you really waiting for a coupon!? LOL!

  65. HTT, your comments where great. It’s the rain on the (expletive)g parade person that was taking HERSELF seriously that was the party pooper.

    And I want a coupon for a hedgehog with a laptop and a towel and a flower ….. 😀

  66. ka9q's wife says:

    holy shit on a shingle that was great Passenger. Poor wee anime hammy so innocent. The best part is i actually call my hubby and ask him what he is wearing in my creepiest tones.
    Love it.

  67. I love the coupon! I think I’ll give it to… my hamster! She’ll appreciate it.

  68. “My sister and I just snorted wine out our respective noses at your comment…”

    And I bet you two were a sight – wish I had video to send to CNN! [hee.] 😉


  69. Constance says:


    I’m very upset. I printed your alleged “hamster cupon” and I took it to FIVE local pet shops…FIVE!!!! Each one smugly DENIED my request for a free hamster and all of his tiny accoutrements. THEN to add insult to injury, they LOOKED AT ME FUNNY!


    I blame YOU cute overload! Now I can never show my face the local pet shops again!

    *cries and gazes longingly at the spot on her desk where her new furry friend would have resided*

  70. what if you wanted a girl hamster? i smell discrimination!

  71. Meg–am I remembering rightly that you’re some sort of graphic designer? If I am, and if you designed this coupon, just wanted to say from one artist to another:

    I love how the yellow is purposely printed slightly to the left to look like the registration is off. *Really* nice touch.

  72. ka9q's wife says:

    your parents might have made you themselves but i don’t think you were free. And i think some of your tiny accoutrements were downright expensive. But i have no doubt you were the best value they ever got.

  73. Atie-Kay says:

    Holier Than Thou- nice