No, hamster tongues are not a figment of your imagination

You thought you only saw hamster tongues in your dreams—the dreams where you went to the Puppy-Comic Book-ice cream-trampoline store. But no. THEY’RE REAL!


I swear it’s true! Thanks to Kappa Alpha frat bros Monty ‘Ornk! Ornk!’ and Wire.



  1. OMG!!!! Hammie tongue!!!! I can die happy now…. SQUEEEEEEEEEE

  2. So cute. 🙂

  3. EEEE! He looks like he’s been eating a cherry popsicle!!!

  4. Hammie tongue would come in handy when I have to lick stamps! What a wittle tongue!


    the BEF! I’m blinded!


  6. AIEEE!!!

    Um, “Can Ya tell me how to get–how to get to the Puppy-Comic Book-ice cream-trampoline store!!!”

    *Sesame Street Theme*

  7. BenPanced says:

    I wanna hammie kiss!

  8. ♥'s G.D. & animals says:

    tongue-licious! how tweet! i wuv him! aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwww! mine!

  9. wow. now i have new reasons to visit the pet store today. i will have hammie tongues, and they will be soft and popcicle red!!!!

  10. SUPER SWEET!!!!! Poofy pouches and anerable BEF!!

  11. Frat guys + hamsters = EEEEEEEEEEKKKK!!!!!!!!!!

  12. Last night I dreamt that baby pandas roamed wild in Western Pennsylvania. Now THAT’S a good dream!

  13. “Is… is that blood??”

    I’m telling you, hamsters are just freakin’ SCARY.

    (Sarah — OK, I have dream jealousy. Mine are mostly about impossible architecture.)

  14. I saw a lot of hammie tongue back in my hamster owning days.

    I remember years ago when I had my hamster Monkey how she was cleaning her paws one day and suddenly licked my nose when I brought her up to my face to kiss her.

  15. Comics? Are you sure it wasn’t gaming – didn’t he have a booth at Squee3?

    I think the new hammie game console introduced there was the ‘Wee’.

  16. and..the little paws, with their little pads…and each perfect little claw…and…

  17. No Theo, that’s not blood.

    Though I once had my hamster Ariela go crazy and get scared. She bit my hands in about six places, leaving them dripping, although I didn’t notice the bleeding until my mother brought it to my attention. I was too busy trying to catch Ari! She hopped around (and who knew they could hop?!) but my mother finally caught her while I cleaned myself up.

  18. kendosan says:

    the paws…

    The PAWS!

    Does he look like Lou Costello to anyone else?

  19. “Mmm–salty!”

  20. One day, Christina, a TRUE vampster pic will slip through CO Labs screening & get posted. Then you’ll see.
    [pipe organ music in E minor!]

  21. Theo, no one will notice if it does because vampsters don’t show up in mirrors or on film!!!!

  22. ka9q's wife says:

    that picture just killed me. That tongue, the face, Those beady eyes looking up and oh god those paws. That hammy will take over the world one day and we won’t be noticing cuz out head will be ‘sploding.

    Can i get a squeee people. Amen

  23. sooooooooooooooooo cute!!!!

  24. That is a conundrum, J. Poe. Maybe thermal imaging? Night vision?

  25. Eeep!

    The prophecy! The prophecy!

    *Sinks into a deep trance*

    And lo it came to pass that the hammy did visit the house of many brothers.

    And the brotherhood did drink and revel.

    And the hammy was much offended.

    ‘Forsooth, thou Bacchanalian brethren I am not a mere totem for your amusement. I am the hammy of legend. And I shall bring peace to the earth. Behold!’

    And the hammy did stick out his tongue and bestow the lick of truth upon three of the brethren.

    And then there arose from the masses a Squee that did resonate through-out the campus, rippling outward for all mankind to hear.

    A great peace and joy fell upon the brethren

    And cupcakes did rain from the heavens.

    And the rivers and oceans did turn to liquid
    chocolate of varying hues.

    And the sun did more brightly shine…. but did not emit harmful UV rays.

    Thus spoke the hammy, “Transmit my image far and wide so that all those who see it shall, tremble and squee and know peace.”

  26. Laurie C says:

    I was just gonna say that the reason his eyes are shining is that he’s thinking, “Now that I know how good he tastes, if I can just trip this human on the stairs, I’ll eat like a king!”

    But EricaE tells a much better story.

  27. lauowolf says:

    And no one has mentioned the perfect and magnificent spread of whiskers here.
    I assume you were all too distracted by that tongue.
    (That tongue…. Must do the bidding of hammy, must please the bearer of the pink tongue….)
    And no, no stamps with this tongue.
    Can you imagine how long it would take hammy to lick an entire stamp?
    He’d have to start over, because the first bit would dry out.
    Much too much like work for a little guy like this.

  28. EricaE!
    We have an ORACLE!

  29. estella says:

    Eeeeeeeeee lookit those tiny paws with each individual toe clinging on the finger!!! The sparkling mischievous eyes! Twitchy nose and whiskers!

  30. The tiny paw keeping the finger in place! ^_^

  31. I only reveal what the voices tell me to. ;o)

  32. Put that finger away! can’t see enough of hammie-tongue to truly believe!

  33. Erica: LOL!!! Huzzah! May it be so! 😀

  34. I dunno about Lou Costello…he looks more like Vincent Price to me…which brings us back around to the Vampster side of town.

  35. Tell us more Oh wise EricaE… we await with glee and squees!

  36. Weeeell, M-… the voices did mention something about offerings of baked-goods like cake, danish, assorted cookies….

    I’m setting up a shrine… Um yeah, and I will take your offerings to the hammy personally.

    *Gives a furtive side-long glance to see if anyone is buying this.*

  37. Oh Jesus that is just too cute.

    BTW, I had a dream about Neil Gaiman last night. Not sure what to think about that, other than I need to buy another volume of Sandman.

  38. Oh my goooooooooooooooooooooodness!!! As the picture slowly loaded, I first saw the ears on that cutie pie and I nearly hyperventilated. That tiny little tongue just did me in! *melts*

  39. How’d you know about my dreams?!?!

    **suspicious stare**

    Are you with Homeland Security? [Homeland Security: CSI (Cute Stuff Investigation)]

  40. Ummm Oracle EricaE… how about lazagna? Will the hammie take lazagna… I make 12 different versions! *l*

    (I only assemble and decorate baked goods…)

  41. Can’t say i’ve every seen a hamster tongue! How cute is that?!

  42. M-
    I have consulted with the hammy. Offerings of lasagna are acceptable. Hammy prefers spinach lasagna with lots of cheese.

    If you would like to become an acolyte in the sacred bakery of the Benevolent order of the Sisters of the Fluffy Cupcake, I’m sure we could find a place for you as a cake decorator.

  43. Kris, in New England says:

    More than the tongue – how bout those too sweet little pet feet??? With the hint of soft pink pads…SQUEE! And the clear adoration in the eyes – this hammie luffs his human…in more ways than one! 🙂

  44. Cupcake? No!!! The Benevolent Order is under fire! A cat-rat-pack-attack on fluffy orange cupcapes is underway even now!!!

  45. oh goodnight! I can’t even breathe it’s so cute… someone QUICK!!! ask the hammie if he’ll perform mouth to mouth!

  46. oh lordy. I had a fixed expression of complete GLEE on my face for about 3 minutes after viewing this.



  47. My God. ‘cupcakes’

    And I always preview before posting. Wow.

  48. Oh my goodness that’s too damn cute!!!! Put THAT on a shirt!!!!!

  49. ::::::::THUD:::::::::::

    [knocked out cold from hamster tongue cuteness]

  50. pistache268 says:

    grab giant finger, then lick.


  51. Svenster says:

    Nice try Norty, I don’t think Mr.Hammyjammies is going to fall for that one. ;-D

    Though I wouldn’t mind getting a MTM from Hammy myself…
    Oh, and the beadiness of the eyes is simply… outstanding!

    Peace, love & kittens /Sven

  52. Aubrey-

    More of the prophecy…

    And lo the cat and the rat shall join forces and dine on the cake of the cup.
    And they shall grow bold their hunger slaked on sprinkles shaped of hearts and stars.
    And the hammy saw this and cried out,
    “Do you not seeith… there are cupcakes and sprinkles for all. Behold!”
    And cupcakes of chocolate, and vanilla, lemon and orange and even butterscotch and some with cream centers and some chips of chocolate… (well you get the idea) did rain from the skies. Their icings all the colors of the rainbow and their sprinkles and cups of foil did sparkle in the sunlight.
    The cat and rat stood amazed.

  53. Attn: Meg — about that concept of picking *one* comment for the Sunday Spotlight… you’re reading these, right?

  54. ooooooooooh it is soooo cute! i just can’t resist! what didi you put on your finger to realize this picture ;-)??

  55. aww byoootiful starry hammy eyes!

  56. Tracibub says:

    Anyone read “Stone Soup” in the comics this week or last? Alix brought home a “Hamstrat”…half hamster, half rat. It’s a pretty funny story line. Go find it on either: or 🙂 I think the drawing of the hamstrat is adorable!

  57. Hey Oracle EricaE… does that prophecy thingy say anything about the cup(caketh) runith overith with cuteness in there? *g*

  58. Has anyone noticed those claws digging into the finger? The time has come for the Hammie Digital Revolution.

    Battalions of Hammies have joined, marching to the Hamthem:

    We are hammies
    Beware our power
    The time has come;
    This is our hour!
    Our eyes are black,
    Imparting rays
    If we tell you to stop,
    There you stays!
    We are hammies
    And don’t care about grammar
    Bow to our power don’t stall
    Or stammer!

  59. Theo, as usual, you’re right—picking one comment is like, totally imposs!

    Maybe top three comments for Sunday Night Wrap Up?

  60. Hmmm… Aubrey, I think you might be on to something… It all seems a bit too convenient that an ultra cute hammy would come claiming to be the bringer of world peace…
    And he used cupcakes to gain our trust!
    The fuzzy bastard! He’s diabolical.
    I can not live in a world where cake has been reduced to an agent of evil.

    *Swallows a handful original cherry Pop Rocks and takes gulp of Coke.*

    Good bye cruel world!


    Heh …Perhaps not…

  61. Ponygirl says:

    Squeeeeeeeeee! Goodness that is wrong.

  62. “If we tell you to stop,
    There you stays!” [chortle]

    EricaE — stay with us, girl. The future might still end up OK. In my vision, The One is a marmie (what else?)

  63. My God, yes! They’re destroying from within!

  64. *sniff* But… cake… Theo, cake is good an innocent and pure. And they tainted it. *sobs*

    And the sprinkles… My God… the sprinkles…

    *whispered* oh…. the horror….

  65. ManekiNeko says:

    What is the sound of one hamster luuurping?

  66. Rule #21?: Have a teeny tiny tongue

  67. EE — does this help at all?

    PS — sprinkles were NEVER on the side of right and good. Some folks call them “jimmies” fer crysakes.

  68. A Fine Morsel says:

    Little hammie tongue and little hammie paw together! I’m in squee heaven!

  69. Svenster… *shaking fist* I was hoping to sneak under the radar on that one… now that little hammie’ll never snorgle me!


  70. Okay, I don’t want to bring this up, but what have the boys at Alpha Kappa been putting on their fingers to get this littl hammy to lick so adorably. Is it carrot juice–in a frat house? Or do hammies like beer?

  71. EE, just remember. Cake doesn’t kill people, hammies kill people. 😛

  72. Svenster says:

    Oi, Norty!
    Try fainting.
    Methinks hamsters never will be able to resist a CO-addict in need.

    That reminds me; my bunny (in bunnyheaven now) used to lick our finger when we had apple juice on’em, but he would often get a bit carried away and have a good nibble. 😀

  73. Wait, wait, wait… what?

    All the KA bros at my university (actually, the vast majority of frat bros at my university) would never, EVER be caught doing something so adorable as to let a hammie lick their finger, let alone send it into a site like this. Heck, they’d not likely admit they knew this site existed.

    You boys out there wanna give your brothers at Ole Miss a lesson or two in cuteness?

  74. i love this picture.
    i made an animated avatar with the licking hamster


  75. Props, jaap!

    Theo, you’ve got a compatriot.

  76. : )

    How can a tiny tongue do anything?

  77. Those two little glistening spots on his tongue – omigawd too cute!


  78. that is the single cutest picture i’ve ever seen.

  79. Theo and Oracle E–How will we know it’s not the Anti-hamster?

  80. Dunno for sure, but I suspect that if you shake hands/paws/tentacles, and no energetic reaction occurs, briefly creating a new sun and/or black hole in your neighborhood, then probably it’s one of the “good” hammies.

    Of course, I’ll more of an authority on this subject if The One does indeed turn out to be Threebert the Tiger Tabby (of Ultimate Destiny).

  81. The Puppy-Comic Book-icecream-trampoline store. XDDDD Don’cha just /love/ the commentery on this site? Reminds me of that one episode of The Simpsons, when Bart’s class were on a feild trip, and they passed the Puppy-Comic Book-icecream-trampoline store, or something like that and went to a really, really bad place for a feild trip. I remember when I was petting my guinea pig really comfertably on my personal hammock, and then after a while she started LICKING ME. She never licks me usually, nor have I found many cases when a guinea pig did actually lick someone. *feels special*

  82. “Dunno for sure, but I suspect that if you shake hands/paws/tentacles…”

    Are you saying that a hamster can be a mason?

  83. To my way of thinking, *this* is the ultimate hamster tongue pic:

  84. Ha! Shrewd frat dewds. They know how to pick up women: pass around pics of teeny, fluffy, beady-eyed goodness licking your finger and watch the chicks squueeeee. 🙂

  85. Now I want to join the order of the Benevolent Sisters of the Fluffy Cupcake, but only if I get to take a vow of cuteness.

  86. Displayname says:

    EE – Fuzzy Bastard?
    Sounds like a new villain for Austin Powers!

  87. jenni joon says:

    Wait a sec? Are you tryin’ to tell me that before C.O. existed, there was such a thing as hammie tongue?? HOw come such an amazingly cute…. PHENOMENON was kept under wraps like this?? HUH? Someone eh-pleeeze ‘splain it to me… ‘cuz I’m trippin’ over how freakin’ cute this is!

  88. Ivy_potter17 says:

    Soooooo cute…

  89. Aubrey’s comment about Squee3 is just as cute as the hammie tongue. I LOL’d!

  90. I think you mean the fireworks, candy and puppy-dog store. 😛 Or maybe the box factory?

    What a cute hammy 🙂

  91. Monty Frost says:

    My life is complete, now that I have had a submission posted on CO. A salute to real KAs everywhere. [Giving secret handshake…]

  92. Alas… I the Oracle of Hamphi can not support my worldly needs with erm… Oracaling… yeah, so, I was forced to actually work. *sigh*

    Theo, I share your dream of a better job and better world. (And jimmies are a specific species of sprinkle meant more for ice-cream than cupcakes.)

    ElfOwl,this is true… though the evil hammy could poison or drug the cake, the cake itself is still pure.

    Jaypo, I am not certain how one will know the anti-hamster. The black hole does sound like a sign that certainly screams that something is amiss. But I would think the anti-hamster more cunning. I would say that if he, once gaining your loyalty (and teaching you the secret handshake) asks you to help him in the violent over throw of society as we know it, he may indeed have other nefarious plans.
    I’m not saying the world couldn’t stand a good cleaning and pressing these days but the violence thing might be a tell.
    Reference this for examples of bad creatures gone cute and cute creatures gone bad.

    Nilla, a vow of cuteness is certainly required upon entering the services of the benevolent order of the Sisters of the Fluffy Cupcake.

  93. Yay for Meg-dad!

  94. o.o Who published the Mason stuff? I thought that stuff was like…ya know, secret.

  95. My hamster, Petra, licks me sometimes…particularly if I try to hold her after eating a quesadilla…she loves cheddar cheese.

  96. How hilarious is it that FRAT bros submitted this picture? That’s right! CO is for BOYS too!

  97. Kawaii~! Oh gosh, this is really something! This must be so much work, to get an actual good picture that is not blurry! Well done!

  98. idk my bff jill? says:

    Sooo cutee