He gets more done before 9AM than you do in a day

Check out Albert "Goooooooaaaal!!!!" Einstein here, the smartest goldfish of all time. He remembers tricks for a whole TEN DAYS and has earned the much sought-after title of "fish with the largest repetoire of tricks" in the 2007 Guinness Book of World Records.

Bravo – o – o !!! [bubbles]

Albert: ‘ehn!‘ [inching soccer ball toward goal]


Congratulations to Dean and son, for their brave and tireless teaching of Albert. Hooray!




  2. (sigh… this is what happens when you post before reading Meg’s captions, people… don’t let it happen to you)


  4. Okay Theo… how about … SUSHIIIII!!! *g* Actually I used to have a series of Betas respectively named, Stick (the fish) Sushi and Wasabi… though the worst were probably Alpha and Omega, the Betas… yeah… cheesey I know..

    this big guy rocks though!

  5. AWWWW! I have nothing profound to say, I just like him.


  6. This guy is too cool! None of the fish I ever had could do any tricks!

  7. BTW….How do you teach fish to do tricks?????

  8. Ooops! Should have checked out the link before that last post.

  9. adorababy says:

    that fish is super cute & smart

  10. Thinker — maybe that should be *snorkle-fishy* ?

  11. OMG, I love this little guy and his teeny soccer ball!

  12. Tony James says:

    Caution: The Department of the Blindingly Obvious warns that snorgling fish may lead to inhalation of water and subsequent drowning of the snorgler. Keep away from children under 36 months.

  13. Heh! He reminds me of my gold fish, Google (cuz he was one of those black googly-eyed ones). Google (who predated the search engine, BTW) liked to be pet. He’d swim up to the top and I’d pet his little head and give him food. It was probably mostly the food, but he did often remain at the top ignoring the food until after I’d pet him.

  14. Theo: yes, possibly. Although if I’m going to be pedantic it would be “snorkel”, though perhaps that’s your point.

    Tony James: LOL.

  15. This is one of the coolest things! I’m impressed! Way to go goldie goaler!

  16. Some people just have to much time on their hand…. poor little goldfish!!

  17. Thinker — maybe one depends on the other.

    Equip’st thy snorkel
    Before ye snorgle
    Lest ye gurgle
    With features purple.

  18. OK, full-on belly laugh @ Theo! You are the *best*, man. I love you.

  19. (I just snorgled my water bottle laughing at Theo. Maybe I *do* need a snorkel :-D)

  20. Oh GREAT. Now I can’t eat fish anymore. CO has already turned me off meat entirely.
    Meg, you’d better not start posting pictures of cute salads. If you do, I’m a dead woman.

  21. cool! a footballing god fidh just like beckham!

  22. This picture reminds me of all the possibilities of the universe.

  23. Jan Spencer says:

    Oh man, so much for sushi tonight…Maymee, I’m with you!!!

  24. Christine says:

    Quick, what’s a fish with no eye’s?

  25. Christine says:

    A FSH!

  26. I’m enjoying the orange of the fishie and the orange of the goal posts. A very sporty statement.

    Anyway, I’m reminded of something that happened to me when I was very young: my brother put my pet goldfish in my pencil box! Took me days to trace the smell!

  27. None of my fish can do any tricks.. Except the fire-eel (yep, thats correct) who diggs up all the plants…

  28. Dustbunny says:

    I’m sure that for a fish, Einstein is relatively smart. I can’t believe I’m the first one to make a “relativity” pun…sheesh!

  29. Yeah – The Fish School!

    I wonder if they’ve got a subdivision for “barnacle tricks”…

  30. It was too elementary
    To speak of relativity
    In this capacity
    So my dear dust bunny
    Though it would have been funny…
    It just didn’t occur to me…

  31. Two notes: Good for you, Maymee (if she starts posting cute salads, you’ll be just fine, don’t worry–I’ve been a vegan for a couple of years and VERY rarely eat salad!)and Jan Spencer! 😀

    Another note: Christine, for SHAME! (That was hilariously awful.)

  32. I betcha fish don’t say “ehn.”

    There must be a more watery equivalent. I will endeavor to discover it! (Clunky useage, I know, but you get the idearrr….)

  33. Dear me – the website has its own theme tune!

    “You don’t like dry land
    You wanna move and spin
    You don’t wanna eat sand
    You wanna keep that grin

    When you join the Fish School!”


  34. Tony James says:

    “I betcha fish don’t say “ehn.”
    There must be a more watery equivalent.”

    Ok – when you’re in the bath, put your head under water and say “Ehn”. That’s the piscine equivalent – don’t ask me how to spell it, though…

  35. The Cat Herder says:

    Instead of “honk shu” when they sleep, goldfish go like this — blOOOp blOOO

  36. Love the Goalfish.

  37. OK, LOL on:

    1. BlOOp blOOO
    2. The dept. of the Blindingly Obvious

    Good God people!

  38. What kind of fish is that, I’m not smart, fishwise anyway.

  39. Just in time for World Cup.
    And WOW – a fish school?! That is cool!

  40. Hammy, it’s a goldfish–read the description.

  41. Actually I think Crrash put it most succinctly, just a few comments back (2:41 PM).

  42. Dustbunny says:

    “Goalfish”. Heh heh. Good one. Why didn’t I think of that??

  43. The Guy Over There says:

    Yay for fishy appreciation! My loaches are way cuter though.

    I remember hearing about how Oscars have personalities like puppies. I wonder if you can get an Oscar to do this same sort of thing?

  44. Oh my god, I LOVE HIM to little bits and pieces!

  45. ka9q's wife says:

    this has nothing to do with this pic although it is cute and i am indeed intrigued by a goal keeping fish. I want to know what do you do when both images on cute tracker are equally cute? I think my head just exploded from the absolutely darling pictures and i just can’t possibly choose.

  46. “Goalfish” and “blOOOp blOOO”
    get a Yay!

    Two squid, four squid
    Six squid, a dollar [sand]
    Everyone for fish snorglin’
    Stand up an’ holler!

    (And NO, I was NOT a cheerleader – not the done thing for the arty types… ;))

  47. ka9q’s wife: when this happens, it’s caused by neurons frying from extreme Cuteness Overload. You have no alternative but to slide gibbering under your desk in a catatonic state until your brain re-achieves equilibrium. However, beware: you will be far more vulnerable to the same attack occurring in the following period of time; so it’s best to avoid the Cute Tracker for at least a day after that.

  48. I think this fish is wearing Dundee United strip.
    Christine: love the joke! 😀

  49. ka9q’s wife: when the pictures are equally cute (or uncute–hey, we all have our tastes), i CLICK NOTHING! if you must keep tracking cuteness, you can refresh the page for a new contest.

  50. Minky T. F. says:

    Two things:
    #1-How’d you teach the fish that?
    #2-Where’d you find the soccer set?


  51. And here I thought that goldfish couldn’t be cute. How wrong I was!

  52. Hunter D. says:

    Two things:
    1. Christine, that was a crummy joke. Stop that.
    2. Fish playing soccer is a great idea. Wunder who taught the fish that…?

  53. Jessica says:

    That is one talented fish. Even I can’t play soccer that well! Please tell me his name is David Bekham!

  54. OMG that fish plays soccer that is funny!

  55. that fish is so cute.i love the ider of FISH SOCKER i love socker mabe i cold joyn in

  56. Faith it is relly funny but it is cute.

  57. I want him on my team!!!

  58. that’s really cute…lol..my brother’s fish would do a flip if you knocked on his fish bowl twice..

  59. Evangelina♥ says:

    Forget the World Cup. I’m all about the World Bowl.

    OK. Cheap shot, cheap shot.

  60. That was the best Soccer Playing Fish

  61. hehe,maybe we should have another kind of World Cup

  62. the red fish dribbles the ball, he shoots he SSSSCCCCOOOORRRREEEEESS!!!!
    wat a lil suga-lumpxx